Sharing Our Stories - Christine Difrancesco

[00:00:00] The views, thoughts and opinions expressed in the following program belong solely to the host and guest and do not necessarily reflect those of this radio station. Our parent company, advertisers or affiliates. Welcome to Sharing Our Stories. We share stories of support for individuals in recovery

[00:00:15] from substance misuse and mental health related issues. There are numerous pathways to recovery and each week we welcome powerful leaders and role models who have struggled in drug and or alcohol addiction have found a pathway to recovery and who thrive as positive community members

[00:00:29] with an ongoing vision of success. Join us as we share our experiences, strength and hope. When the world says give up, hope whispers, try it one more time. What's going on Recovery Fam? And welcome back to Sharing Our Stories. My name is Slim with Nani Al Jaleel

[00:00:46] from Tribe Recovery Homes and if you're just checking in this program is all about addiction and recovery. We bring in a guest each week who has dealt with addiction to tell you where they are in their recovery so we can share that yes, recovery happens.

[00:01:00] So thank you for being here. Like, share and subscribe to this program and if you know somebody out there struggling in addiction tell them about it, tell them we're live right now and send them this way or share this program with them if you're listening on a podcast.

[00:01:16] Nani, it's Women's History Month. Yes, it still is. That's right the whole month. And shout out to Christine. How are you doing Christine? I'm wonderful. Thank you Slim. Our guest is Christine DiFrancisco from Rochester, New York. And we're gonna introduce her,

[00:01:34] well that's her introduction I guess to start but we're gonna turn it over to her in just a minute. But I wanted to ask Nani, you know like how to make laws and stuff happen, don't you? Like- How to make them happen.

[00:01:45] Yeah or like, you know how to go down go down to the Capitol building and get things rolling right? I mean that's some of the things that we do. I know people who know how to make things like that happen. I know some people.

[00:01:58] So since it's Women's History Month we briefly talked about this last week. How do we make a women's recovery day? Where we're like, hey, March 15th is always women's recovery day every year. How do we do that here in Colorado?

[00:02:11] We talk to people, we get it on a ballot, we go down there, we advocate for it. That's what we would do. Let's do it. We should. Let's do it. We should do something like that. And then we have everybody that watches the program

[00:02:21] and so on like you know put their two cents on it so we can all come on. Let's make it happen. What we should do slim is me and you put something on a picket and just walk around in a circle. I'll do it. Yeah, come on. You're 15.

[00:02:33] Just go around. I'm gonna need more women cause I don't think I'm the right spokesperson. What pretty you up slim? Thank you. Pretty me up. Yeah. Cause I think a women's recovery day in the month of Women's History Month would be so cool.

[00:02:44] The same month as International Women's Day. Yeah. And have a women's recovery day. I agree. I like this idea. Okay cause you're the only person I know that knows how to make these things happen. I can talk about things but you make things happen.

[00:02:57] We're, yes we are way makers. You're right. Yes. I mean literally I can't think of anything that you don't make happen. Like when you put your mind to something you do it. Thank you. Yeah. Women's recovery day. The 15th is the day.

[00:03:12] No I just threw that one out there but it has to be a mid month. A mid month. March day. Yep March day. So we're working on that. We're working on it. Well hi you heard it. Got it on the books.

[00:03:20] Okay so I got it on the books. I want whoever out there knows how to do these things too. Get in contact with us so we can push Nani over that cliff to make it happen. We're off the right place. That's right. Yes. We're gonna do it.

[00:03:32] So we got a great guest. Yes we do. Christine Defranchesco I said that right. You did. It's a lot of letters. It is. From Rochester New York. Now you are a national certified peer recovery support specialist. Correct. You are a certified equine assisted coach. Correct. That's horses.

[00:03:50] That is. Equine. Equine tomato tomato. Equine equine. And you are the owner CEO of Serenity Stables LLC. Which I believe has to do, I'm guessing here, has to do with mental health recovery horses and using horses to make people helping their recovery and their mental health.

[00:04:09] All of it. And I just pulled that out of the air. You did. You did great. Good. All right. But I'm gonna expect you to tell us more about that. Of course. As you talk about yourself and share with us about where you are and where you've been.

[00:04:22] Sure. So I wanna thank you so much for being here. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to be here today. I really appreciate it. There's no sharing our stories without our guests here to share. So thank you. That's true. So we're gonna turn this over to you.

[00:04:36] It is Christine DeFrancisco from Rochester, New York. Woo-woo! And she is our guest here for sharing our story. So turn it up and let's hear about recovery. Yes. All right. I'm in long-term recovery from three decades of alcoholism. And this started when I was 13 years old.

[00:05:00] I took my first drink and I blacked out and I never stopped. So through my teenage years I drank all through just on the weekends. And then when I hit 21, it was like, it was on and it was like every day. But growing up was difficult.

[00:05:21] Sharing part of my story that is difficult because I think it's one in four women suffer from sexual abuse. And when I was growing up I had a babysitter that had systematically abused me from the ages of one and a half

[00:05:38] till I was about three and a half. And I never told anybody. I was just, I was scared all the things. When I was about nine years old I had said something to my mother. Thank God she believed me and I had gone into therapy

[00:05:54] but no charges were crossed. Statue limitations had passed. This is New York state, seven years had passed. But this really it set the tone for like what my image was about my body growing up like when I hit around 13, 14 years old I started getting bullied a lot.

[00:06:17] And like chased off the bus and beat up by the other guys. It was awful called names. So now I really, really hated myself. And so right during this time alcohol came into my life and it took all the pain away. It took everything away.

[00:06:37] So I just never stopped with that. It was just a hard time going through that and feeling that. I think a lot of people in addiction are some of the most sensitive people on the planet. And we've used the substances because everything that we felt

[00:06:56] was such at a heightened state and can't deal with it. You know other people deal with their issues maybe and gambling, sex, food. You know there's other ways and for me that was certainly alcohol. Yeah and it took me all the way through adulthood.

[00:07:17] When I was 43 is when I got sober. But during that time I had awful relationships just really dysfunctional. And I met my husband when I was 30 years old and I met him up in Alaska. And when we met we are the exact same age.

[00:07:45] So when we met it was you know party on we didn't have any children. So we would just we just partied a lot and our relationship was dysfunctional. You know there was infidelity on both parts domestic abuse on both parts financial destruction. We had all of this

[00:08:08] when I was 34 I found out I was pregnant with our daughter. And during that time I had actually from the ages of 23 until I was 33 I was a topless dancer and I started dancing when I was 23 because I bought my first horse then I had to feed him.

[00:08:33] I was just you know those not cheap No they're not and I thought oh my gosh how am I going to feed this horse? My girlfriend said well why don't she come to the club and I was like oh no no no and like well maybe

[00:08:47] I'm like give me a shot. You know and that just kicked off a decade of alcohol, cocaine, fueled chaos. You know in between that I waited tables to I didn't do it straight the dancing but and I waited tables in between so for 30 years

[00:09:09] you know I did wait tables but that lifestyle even in the restaurant industry as we were discussing before we went on air how that is just the culture of after the restaurant what do you want to go to the bar? What are we going to yeah and so

[00:09:26] just living just living that whole lifestyle and my husband had lived the same lifestyle so when we were 30 years old it was game on and when I got pregnant with Ariana and after she was born we had stopped the hard drugs but the drinking had continued and between

[00:09:51] Gerald and I my husband Gerald we had accumulated 10 DUIs over our lifetime so it it was a lot so I spent and my 30 years of addiction I spent 15 years trying to get sober and just relapse after relapse after relapse

[00:10:09] and then would give up for a couple of years and then would try really hard I think the longest I got was 11 months and I got stuck in an airport and then I was like well that high and it came off good you know and that was that

[00:10:23] I think all my life and in the treatment I thought I would be okay as long as I got my crap together then down the line once I'm good then I can have a drink and I lived like that because I would be good for a while

[00:10:37] but look at this I can drink wine with dinner and I do that for like six months and that's all I do I'm like see I'm fine and then you know the progression of this disease and it would slowly get worse and worse and worse so that

[00:10:50] that was really hard to deal with I think having all of this experience with just the chaos and the destruction I never knew what inner peace was I never knew and I never knew what it felt like to love myself because I never did love myself

[00:11:11] I had no idea what any of that felt like but getting back to the legal issues with Gerald and I I was always you know on probation having to go do UA's having to do this and being told what to do that was so hard

[00:11:31] I never enjoyed that who does right it would like to be under the thumb so Gerald and I we after after our last DUIs is when we got sober what had happened in 2017 in September of 2017 Gerald had gotten his last DUI our seven-year-old daughter she's now 14

[00:11:58] but our seven-year-old daughter at the time was in the vehicle so CPS got involved and Gerald told me straight you know point blank if you don't stop drinking Christine we're getting a divorce well I couldn't stop I just couldn't and I was at this point

[00:12:15] it had gotten so bad that I was waking up in the middle of the night sweating throwing up shaking uh waiting until the liquor store opened at eight o'clock wait till Gerald go to work so I could scround whatever change I could get with my hoodie and sunglasses

[00:12:36] and my hands trembling to go buy a shooter or a you know if I was gonna buy a pint it was a good day because I knew I was gonna have enough to get through so and then I would finish that

[00:12:48] I'd go end up going back to the liquor store guys like that was just to get me started that was just to get me started so that was uh that was really hard to have to wake up like that and feel like that and at this point

[00:13:02] I had high liver dysfunction um my skin was gray and I weighed about a hundred and twenty pounds and I was I mean I was dying I was dying quite frankly so fast forward five months from Gerald's DUI I got my DUI and that was my last drink

[00:13:24] I knew I was facing prison I knew um that my life as I knew it was over and that I was quite possibly gonna lose everything my daughter my husband I didn't know if my marriage was gonna survive this or not uh so we got sentenced

[00:13:42] and did our time concurrently Ariana almost went into the foster care system but my seventy three year old mother at the time bless her heart stepped up to the plate and took Ariana and she went to Rochester and lived with my mother for eight months

[00:13:59] well Gerald and I served our time Gerald and I got out of incarceration and we actually he got six a year in jail and I got three years in community corrections we both served six months and he was able to get work released so he was able to

[00:14:18] still keep our apartment in our car but all our credit cards everything like just just went we didn't pay anything you know uh so when when we got out we were in mountains of debt

[00:14:32] well first I didn't even know if I was gonna have a home to go to I didn't know if I was gonna even be getting my daughter back I didn't know what that was gonna look like I put myself in treatment

[00:14:43] uh... and did IOP for about nine months and I and I started notice we were repeating kind of the same thing and I asked my therapist I said you know I've been coming here nine months now and are and I am I completed

[00:14:57] he's like Christine you've been done you just keep coming back yeah okay so I got released from the halfway house and they told me that I had to do uh... hundred eighty hours of DUI therapy which is basically a year and a half and I about lost it

[00:15:17] I was like no you don't understand I just did a hundred and forty hours at IOP and I'm good like I don't and well actually was the best thing for me because in that I got introduced to Dr. Lisey Brewerman who

[00:15:32] after six months of being in her group had saw something in me and she pulled me aside along with another uh... lady that was in there Lori Lasseter with me and she asked us would you be interested in becoming a peer coach I said what's that

[00:15:52] I didn't even know what it was so she taught me the first half of my credential so I was like okay and so that was really that was really cool for her to and that's really because of Dr. Lisey it's where all started

[00:16:07] and all started because I had no idea and then I took it from there and made it and made it what it is today um... so after getting out of incarceration and after doing you know DUI DUI therapy um... that catapulted me into well how could I

[00:16:33] combine that with the horses so my horse history is I grew up riding horses pretty much my whole life when I started taking riding lessons when I was about eight years old and uh... rode took lessons until I was about twenty years old

[00:16:51] and I competed in Hunter Jumper and Dressage and did the whole like show circuit thing when I was around twenty I became a riding instructor and then also a horse train I would take horses off the racetrack and then retrain them uh...

[00:17:07] so Gerald and I were talking about buying a house we were getting out of credit card debt and at this time um... I was working at a restaurant but I worked at iHOP because I couldn't work at fancy DNC steakhouses anymore because

[00:17:20] the culture of going out to drink um... so I ended up going to iHOP which actually it was it was kind of cool that I made pretty good money there and it got me into my ranch I'm not gonna complain

[00:17:32] and it was right next to my house I could literally walk there uh... so that was really nice uh... we we just started working I worked overtime I would stay late every single shift um... we reeled in our budget uh... it within two and a half years

[00:17:54] we collected we saved forty five thousand dollars yeah and I don't know how we did that because my whole life I will tell you I lived paycheck to paycheck I've never owned a home I had lived in apartments my whole life so here I was addicted broke middle-aged

[00:18:15] no former education and said I want to do this I want to buy a ranch and you know people could have very easily said you're crazy like look at the stats and I said you're right but I didn't because I believed I could do it why not me

[00:18:35] why not uh... so I got uh... my credentialed in uh... equine assisted coaching because it paired really well with peer recovery coaching so I'm not a therapist right so the only difference with me and the therapy that you would do with horses is the processing at the end

[00:18:57] something comes up with someone's past or trauma I'm not going to delve into that that's not my wheelhouse now I have facilitated with a therapist and that has happened and then she would go in right in real-time in the moment and and do that so uh... yeah she

[00:19:15] that was it that was really nice to be able to do that kind of modality and like see the difference in that what I do is valid even though it's not technically therapy is a therapeutic absolutely absolutely so I thought well why don't I combine

[00:19:33] and I didn't even know because I wasn't a therapist I thought how am I going to be do this without being a therapist and I looked around all different kinds of uh... equine training and a lot of them were

[00:19:47] three years two three years ten grand I'm like oh gosh found this program in wisconsin with pamp-caclemire and it was through the equine she created the equine assisted coaching association and she had trained with one of the pioneers in this field Linda Kahanov

[00:20:08] who had read her books and I was like oh my gosh I knew Amy I'm like I gotta go to Wisconsin and get the training so I went to Wisconsin and got trained in that modality uh... when we bought the ranch

[00:20:24] we were they asked twenty five thousand dollars over asking price and that twenty five thousand was going to be to get my ranch up and running and we didn't so we got the ranch I didn't have a wheelbarrow I didn't have a hose I didn't have buckets

[00:20:40] I had a couple of panic attacks couple of panic attacks did occur and I thought what am I doing right now Christine you don't even know how to maintain your pastures you don't I didn't even know what an EIN number was

[00:20:55] honestly like my husband had helped me like get stuff up and set up my email I'm technically challenged I am but that's okay I'm gonna be getting better this year it's one of my it's one of my goals I'm great with people and animals

[00:21:09] yeah you know so that's what matters then I got my pocket um... so the credential of the peer coaching and the aqua-assisted coaching just went so well together it worked well together and we bought our ranch three years ago

[00:21:26] and I've been doing this modality now for three years and it's such an honor to be able to work this is my dream it was always been my dream to have horses in my backyard I just thought it was a fantasy I thought like that I would never

[00:21:44] be able to do that uh... you know I hope part of my story offers hope and that you're not alone and that you can really do anything that you want to you know what was up against me people like I said could have said you know

[00:22:04] what are you thinking you can't do that really and I've learned in my experience that getting out of the limiting thinking because everything that I've done to get here I teach my clients to do too so that's the beauty of it that's the beauty of it

[00:22:24] but I'm teaching you know people how to step into their truth um... believing that they can do whatever they want and my belief I feel that reality is more malleable than we think and there's not as many limitations as you may think

[00:22:47] because when you bring it down to everything vibrating right uh... Nikola Tesla said if you want to find the secrets of the universe think of terms of frequency vibration and energy and I'll tell you dealing with the horses that's exactly what I'm dealing with and

[00:23:05] it's a really beautiful thing to bring recovery in with the horses and then stepping into the truth for me to be able to do this I had to follow my heart because if I listened to my brain

[00:23:20] like I said all those other things I had to follow my heart and have the courage to follow my heart in a society that leads by the brain and how did I do that? and then not knowing anything about the business side of things computers

[00:23:41] all this verbiage and things I'm going it like it was beyond me but I said no I can take it I'll find people that do know and take it one one step at a time uh... I'm hoping

[00:23:53] ultimately I want people to be able to step into their truth and into their magnificence but first they have to be sober yeah first things first right yes uh... yeah and if I didn't give humanity the sober version of me I wouldn't be sitting right here

[00:24:14] right now and sharing my story uh... I feel that these horses what they've brought into my life they were always giving me solace my whole life you know when I was being bullied and I'd go and cry in the horse's shoulder and they were helping me all along

[00:24:37] also they were talking to me my whole life I wasn't listening and when I took this course in Equine Assisted coaching I ate a big piece of humble pie because I realized in the show world and how I was taught to ride it was kind of aggressive uh...

[00:25:01] and it wasn't really about what's best for the horse it was they were commodity and not you know can you get me a blue ribbon it was more about ego but this now they're my partners and I get to partner with them and with other people

[00:25:17] and it is such a joy to watch people come to the ranch and at first they're like you know maybe like this and by the time they leave shoulders are down chest is open smiles and like there

[00:25:32] it's like just this weight just sucked right out of it you know it's just a beautiful thing to watch being able being able to do this is really warms my heart I what I've noticed the most with this modality and what the work that I've done

[00:25:49] with people is that it has the four pillars of what it what I feel affects the most and this is communication connection self confidence and self awareness really bring to light uh... what people are struggling with and an addiction and we're in early recovery

[00:26:09] we still have connection we don't even know how to formulate words sometimes or you know because we used our substances to be able to talk and loosen up and now we're still rolling you know and we don't and then we're disconnected from our bodies and they have

[00:26:24] we're not aware of what's going on and the feelings in being touched so developing that self awareness between mind and heart and having that start developing coherence and going oh is that what that means why does my gut hurt maybe I shouldn't do that yeah yeah and

[00:26:43] uh... self confidence for sure because they're realizing that they're not alone and that these animals validate them in a way that they've never been validated she have a thousand pound animal mirroring back to you what you're putting out so which brings me

[00:27:07] to tell a little bit what I like to talk about the magic behind the science what's going on physiologically between the humans and the horses and I share this with all my clients or groups that come out to the ranch because I feel it's really important to understand

[00:27:23] what's going on be it puts intention for the experience in and I realize that the intention is the engine of their of their experience and what we what we're dealing with is the heart and this is really where science meets spirituality and it is about time

[00:27:46] so the heart what we're dealing with is is forty thousand sensory neurons that learn think feeling remember independently of the brain cells so this is like its own brain heart holds over sixty times more electromagnetic energy than that of the brain and every time that

[00:28:10] your heart is beating it's sending electromagnetic pulse out into your biofield and on that pulse is data it's coming out at a frequency that the horses can tune into so they're literally reading the frequencies off your heart and have discernment in those feelings I kind of compare it

[00:28:29] to how a dolphin has sonar because their tatt that it's a completely different sense I mean you can even talk about how dogs have a sense of smell that's a hundred thousand times stronger than ours where they can be they can smell cancer cells they can smell fear

[00:28:45] they can smell emotions so these are it's a whole super sense so with the horses there this is a whole super sense uh... and their heart he meets ten times you let more electromagnetic energy over of then our human heart so what that means

[00:29:04] is when we get in their vicinity and when the biofields converge so like ours is five feet there's biofields twenty to thirty feet so whenever they converge it's at that point that they're they're tuning in to you and when when we're giving off those when our

[00:29:25] heart is getting emitting those electromagnetic energy it is going right into the biofield and what's happening is the vibrational communication precedes the verbal communication and actually this is happening with us as well and we get that in terms of good vibes bad vibes

[00:29:48] are you gonna feel like what? you sit next to them why don't they like that? and they haven't even said anything because your heart is picking up that energy you know your heart is picking up again

[00:29:59] what our society doesn't honor the heart we don't look into all of that we don't realize like how much we're affecting our environment and our reality you know the universe is just bringing and reflecting it back and so the horses reflect back to us

[00:30:16] so what we put out it's like a divine mirror you know they're reflecting back to you and one interesting thing about the horses is that they are aware they are aware that they're aware it's a holding ball game it is it's fascinating to watch what's going on

[00:30:38] and to be able to facilitate these sessions and what I'm doing is facilitating in the moment because what's going on internally with the client I can tell by the cues that my horse is giving me because of the horse the horse is reacting to the client

[00:30:58] but you know the horse can do different reactions or same reactions but it can mean different things it's contextual so it depends on you know what are we talking about what is the relation to where's the client position relation to the horse

[00:31:16] how many other people around is it really about the client you know am I getting a read and I'm able to each of my horses kind of read a little different and so I've been able to really hone in on what they're doing

[00:31:30] because I can see in the client what's going on and so when the horse lets me know then that allows me to pose the right questions then for them to find their own answers because I can see it

[00:31:44] but what good does it do if I just blurt that out this is experiential they need to feel it needs to be palpable right you know make sense yeah and well and I see we do have a little bit of time I would like to

[00:32:00] go into one of my case studies I guess if you will that was one of the most powerful sessions I've ever done so I have this little mare this little Morgan mare that I rescued who is used as a ranch horse and she probably wasn't treated kindly

[00:32:20] we don't know her history I'd say she was abused because when I got her just her reactions and her nervousness and you can you can tell when animals have been abused so she was used ranch horse abused then she went to another lady

[00:32:36] and unfortunately was in a home of neglect not to this lady's fault she was going through divorce she didn't have time for the horse she also couldn't find placement for river because of river's age she has Cushing's disease she was untrained

[00:32:53] so horses like this end up in slaughter she was just trying to keep her alive and didn't know what to do with her so when I bought my horse Sully from her but Sully I'd been riding for eight years and when the owner sold Sully

[00:33:07] I could not afford to buy him at the time because I was saving for the ranch so this other lady took Sully but couldn't they didn't mesh and so we had first tried to refusal at that time I then had I had the funds to buy Sully

[00:33:20] and she gifted me river because I could keep Sully company and it would offload river and really I didn't know what I was gonna do with this horse I was like so I took her in and I started training her well what ended up happening

[00:33:32] is she's my best therapy horse I call her the wounded healer her ability to connect with people that have experienced trauma or neglect and that sadness that ensues she is able to tap right into that so I created this activity because of her

[00:33:52] now a horse's natural ability is to join up and which means if you are honest in your you know in your good environment with them they will follow you but you have to make a connection with them so I have this one activity where I have a client

[00:34:10] take the horse out into the middle of the arena and they tell her a secret and it's between her and the horse and I'm not to know it's something that they can tell a sentient being I say tell the horse something maybe you haven't told anybody before whatever

[00:34:25] and by forming by showing vulnerability to the horse you make immediate connection and then what I have them do is unclip the lead rope from the halter and then I have them so slowly start walking back towards me and then stop and the horse stops with them

[00:34:44] because they're connected now the horse and this has happened a couple of times where the person didn't tell the horse a secret or didn't make that connection and Miss River just stood planted and I'm thinking oh no I'm thinking you know

[00:34:58] I'm thinking oh no I'm like wait a minute she's not a circus performer she's not following excuse me and good because we're trying to form that connection so I have this one client we were talking she had struggles with her church and the church in general

[00:35:19] and felt like controlled manipulated she had told me some things that her pastor had said that was on borderline manipulation and just I was like whoa so she's struggling with spirituality and sense of what God is and all these things and we were in the barn

[00:35:37] we were grooming Miss River so she's listening to us side note horses don't speak English they speak heart so when you're speaking and you whatever you're feeling they're feeling what's coming off your heart and that's how they know what you're saying so we were talking about

[00:35:52] she was talking about her God and I was asking her to define her God and then I she's talking and I said do you feel that your God is down like pointing at you and like you're bad she's like oh yeah yeah it's like okay so well

[00:36:07] and I don't want to I gotta be careful because I don't want to step on anyone's toes but I was coming from a real spiritual standpoint and I was like this God that you're looking for isn't outside of you it's inside of you centers in your heart

[00:36:22] the heart is a portal it's inside it's not outside of you you are it you are part of it you're not separate from it you're an extension of it intimately connected so we we go out to the arena she takes Miss River out she tells her secret

[00:36:41] she's walking back Miss River is walking behind her and nudging her back like this and hard like this when she comes back to me we're talking Miss River then goes behind her she's now at her side steps back goes behind her and is on her back

[00:37:05] and we're talking and she's pushing her back and River would look at me nudge her back look at me and she did this about four times and I'm thinking what is she saying to me but I'm in the middle I'm talking to my client

[00:37:18] I'm in the middle of it so I don't really I just kind of brush it off I don't really know what to think and I'd only been doing this about six months at this point so I'm still learning and so we take her we finish session

[00:37:32] I walk her to her car she says to me would you like to know what I told the horse and I said well if you want to tell me I said you know this between you and the horse she said no I want to tell you she said

[00:37:44] I asked Miss River do you know who God is River was saying you are you are how funny is that and we both started to cry that's so intense it was and I knew I knew that's what River was saying River heard the whole conversation

[00:38:13] and she has never done that since had never done that before and has never done that since that particular being here no never ever so that was just really amazing the wounded healer the wounded healer yes and I have so I have a six acre ranch in Elizabeth

[00:38:33] and it's about 15 minutes from downtown Parker and about 15 minutes from Southlands Mall and Aurora and I I offer groups and I also offer individual sessions and I also accept all Medicaid and this just came about and it is so cool yay and as far as I know

[00:38:58] I'm the only one that offers equine services that accepts Medicaid in the area I may be mistaken if I am I apologize but to my knowledge I am the only one to be the requirements to come and see you to have active Medicaid and be in recovery

[00:39:18] from addiction from substance use disorder and what I work with people outside of addiction do you work with mental health or veterans sure and that's on a private pay basis but yes I work with I actually have a children that I work with I do an equine youth

[00:39:34] interdevelopment program and I do like to do this every June and what this is a four week it's four weeks they come once a week for three hours and I incorporate I bring on a trauma informed yoga instructor the wonderful Maggie Barfoot she comes out

[00:39:54] and then I alternate it with a Tai Chi instructor but I think this year I'm going to do sound bath ooh that's cool sound bath is cool yeah my very dear friend Kira Kira McAllister sound bath is really cool yeah yeah so I think I'm

[00:40:09] I'm gonna be incorporating that and then they do guided meditations and journaling then of course the equine activity and we also go swimming in my pool and so we just incorporate all of this all of that and this is for kids ages 12 to 15 it's $500 for the month

[00:40:30] so it comes out to like it really isn't it comes out to like 125 a session and I keep this group small this group is six kids because I like the cohesiveness of the smaller groups and what I can you know then they start developing that relationship

[00:40:51] you know through the group and it's a really open space for them to share and however you know what they're going through and you know we had kids talking about you know gender identity and bullying and social media without the negative effects that it's had on them

[00:41:10] all these things that kids are coming up with these days yeah I find a lot of joy in working with the children the organization that I work with work under recovery omega is looking to incorporate children with substance use disorder

[00:41:32] I believe and we're working on that right now I don't want to speak too much to that because I don't know a whole lot but we're looking to expand on that you know not a lot of resources for kids no there is it there's no there isn't

[00:41:45] and you know if people want to come see me on a you know on a private pay basis I'm very fine with that and I'm really good and even if you're not in recovery what if you're going through a job changer you're struggling in finding purpose

[00:41:59] or what do I want to do next start finding that inner desire that is my jam and I work a lot on with the conditioned and authentic self and belief systems so that is it's really interesting to be able to do that my

[00:42:18] the main people I work with those people with substance use disorder and then I have my side niche for children so but I do work I do work with others as well I only threw it out there because I can just like I'm hearing this magic

[00:42:33] it is magic it is it's magic it's magical and that's why I'm like do you work with besides addiction you know who else and the kids is amazing I think that's just fantastic yeah and what I would like to do is I would like to start opening up

[00:42:49] uh open groups and I can hold up to 12 people uh per per group I can hold up to 12 people so I'm trying to get if people in the community that want to come you know check this out doing like a for an example

[00:43:08] like a second Saturday of the month have an open group first come first serve you know message me on Facebook and sign up I verify your insurance you're good to go and just kind of bringing people in the community and what a great way to meet others

[00:43:22] in recovery and really whoever shows up at group is supposed to be there the universe has a way of bringing the right people that creates the right dynamic needed for whatever has happened in the session so I stopped trying to control how much you know I said just

[00:43:41] alright whoever you're bringing whoever's coming and it's magic there really is magic guys there is really it's real it is I know it I know it to be true it's real yeah so it's just been such an honor and really and thank you so much

[00:43:59] for allowing me to come here and share my story you know I wasn't sure if I was gonna share my whole story and I thought here it is here I am here you are on the table your most authentic self yes what's so cool about your story Christine

[00:44:15] that I love is that the thing that brought you the most solace as a child right and we had talked about this when we had spoken originally was the same thing that you today are able to bring comfort to people now and I love that about your story

[00:44:34] you had to go through a lot of trials and tribulations as an adult to get here but now it's what you use to bring hope to people who need it the most and you know and I love that about your story it's thank you so much yeah

[00:44:51] thank you so much yeah it's wonderful so you said that you spent 15 years trying to get sober yes so when you fight is it 2017 that you got sober? I got sober February 16th of 2018 February 16th 2018 yeah September was my husband he was five months before okay hey

[00:45:12] and congratulations to him too yeah big shout out what was my first name again? Gerald Gerald Morasek shout out to Gerald shout out to you my man he is my rock you are here in spirit absolutely yes you are he helps me with so much so this last

[00:45:29] this last time when it happened because you struggled with it what do you felt different? this time around well it was my rock bottom okay my child was gonna be taken away I didn't know if I was gonna be have my life as I knew it and I

[00:45:47] I knew I was gonna die and I was like okay and facing prison scared the crap right out of me yeah I mean how many DUIs you said yeah I'm like oh I'm gone I'm done I'm toast I mean 10 is it a three DUIs and that's it? you're

[00:46:04] well yeah I had yeah I mean things changed I mean the times have changed from how that got to that point well I'm a felon now uh huh you know so if you're a felon out there don't worry you can do anything you want I know some amazing

[00:46:19] I knew that stop you I know so many amazing felons yes people that have totally changed their life around it and felons so I would I would rather do things with them besides some people I know who have never committed any crimes but they're just not as good

[00:46:36] as this felon than I know they're just not as good of a person as his felon but it's true but it's absolutely true yeah um so where do people just your website for Serenity Stables where do people go? sure so my website is recoverywithserenitystables.com okay my email

[00:47:02] is serenitystables2021 at gmail.com and my phone number is 720 891 1142 so you can just reach out to me anytime I will will return calls within 24 hours most of times sometimes 48 but I'm usually within one day I'll be right back with ya and you don't have to have any

[00:47:28] experience with horses oh thank you for bringing that up no no horse experience necessary so all of this is done from the ground in kind of like what a session looks like is we do like a check-in um I will go around and uh explain to people

[00:47:49] kind of like the magic behind the science what I did here if they've already been out of course I'm not going to do that again but they will go into introductions with the horses and I have them pet and groom and interact with the horses

[00:48:01] I have them do that every time because all the horses are different and they're all different on different days and it just really brings them into the present moment uh then we will go into an activity of some sort

[00:48:13] and I have a lot of different activities that I do it depends on the day and the amount of people I have and what I'm working with I just really do everything in the moment and then we come back into our circle whether that be in the barn

[00:48:27] or in the arena and we just kind of process the day's activities and I always really like to relate it to what did you learn today that you can apply to your everyday life how can you take this how can you take the wisdom from the herd

[00:48:41] and apply it to your daily life how are you going to do that what did the horses show to you and I also asked in the beginning what do you need from the horses today what would you like you know to kind of set that intentionality

[00:48:54] in my groups can and depending on size can run up to two hours and then also and sometimes they go longer individual sessions you know I don't look at my clock and you know I end organically and it makes you because if something's rough

[00:49:13] has come up for somebody I'm not just going okay was that good on your way I'm gonna make sure I'm buttoning them up you know we're gonna seal them up with like maybe some guided imagery or breathing and five senses what do you see in the room

[00:49:25] bringing people back this isn't in check in check out that was your hour bye right yeah no I mean that doesn't serve anybody right and so when people come into my ranch you know being in the restaurant industry for many many years

[00:49:40] and coming from a big Italian family you know the sense of hospitality at the moment they're on the ranch I'm at the gate waving at them hi and when you leave give it a heart and then providing you know soft drinks maybe a light snack

[00:49:59] and just really welcoming and that they feel welcomed it's so important to me but you need that for new things if I'm not feeling welcome I don't know if I want to be here already this is new to me

[00:50:14] right and I pay attention to a lot of the details you know what's it from their perspective coming in how are they gonna feel and even sometimes when I set up the chairs this is kind of stupid I'll sit in each chair

[00:50:26] to make sure that they're good enough with the parts of how is it gonna feel to each person that's really smart those details I guess it matters details like that matter yeah do you have anything that you do daily for your recovery

[00:50:44] yeah so I wake up at four in the morning whoa uh huh every day and so at four in the morning till about six I'm in my time and it looks a little different every day and sometimes journaling or doing my meditations or just doing nothing

[00:51:02] whatever that is that is my time because I can't really call anybody right cause no one really sleeps and they can't call any businesses so this really it's my time to you know do things then at six I gotta take my daughter to school feed the horses

[00:51:19] everything starts at six sharp I'm on and until about eight o'clock at night so yeah yeah I pretty I don't fall asleep I kind of pass out I've done for the day see you tomorrow at four a.m. yeah but it's really special

[00:51:41] to be able to do the work that I do and help people it's so silly you're not getting up in the morning like oh gosh here we go again you're getting up like right here's a couple hours for myself gonna and then hey we're off to

[00:51:56] yeah I even spread some positivity I even schedule like my riding time like the time to go on a trail ride or my fun time I schedule it and then two to four I'm taking my nap I have to work into the evening

[00:52:08] and I get up at four I gotta take a nap in the middle of the day I schedule my naps I schedule my diet downtime do you know what I put on my on my calendar for Saturday Sunday don't freaking think about it all day

[00:52:23] I never done that I'm like I'm gonna do it and so I want to go plug in something and it said don't freaking think I'm oh I'm busy sorry are you free this weekend to just relax yes that I am yes you're free for

[00:52:36] don't even think about it don't even think about it I did it don't do nothing this weekend first time I ever put that on my calendar good uh huh our guest has been Christine DiFrancisco from Rochester New York she is the owner and CEO of Serenity Stables LLC

[00:52:57] a certified equine assisted coach uh huh and the national national certified and a national certified peer recovery support specialist um anything you want to share with those people listening that might be suffering addiction or have a family member that's suffering in addiction before we wrap up sure

[00:53:18] I think the biggest thing is you're not alone you have to reach out and ask for help please reach out and ask for help there there's so much shame attached to this and this is why I recover out loud and if you have family members just know

[00:53:46] that you can't force anybody you're not going to force anybody to do anything and if you look at the big scheme of things in the big picture we all come to this earth for different reasons and have different life lessons to learn

[00:53:59] and we all go through our own chaos and maybe it's part of the process maybe it's part of the journey and if you can take that off your off your shoulders and just let them had I not gone through everything I did

[00:54:12] I wouldn't be doing the thing I am today so in the mud there's flowers yes 100% true yep yeah so just don't give up and really if you're struggling with addiction just please please reach out for help and know that you're not alone and there's nothing wrong with you

[00:54:40] and that you're loved and actually you have such every human being have such beautiful gifts to give but we have to be sober to be able to give those gifts and live in our heart what's your joy what's your passion start doing that make start doing your joy

[00:55:00] live in your joy you got a lot of people that have given you a shout out and sending you some love so Megan Quarry she said that you were just amazing Laura Perez says I love the work that you do Seth Benhouse I hope I said that correctly

[00:55:18] Seth thanks for sharing and Jennifer Plays she said thank you for being so vulnerable and sharing your amazing and inspiring story so we are so fortunate to have you providing such unique powerful and impactful services to our community and grateful for you oh that warms my heart

[00:55:36] I almost started to cry and um just thank you for that work that you're doing and for thank you Slim and for I know you said you went to Wisconsin to learn about equine coaching assisted coaching but it's not something that I know a lot about

[00:55:54] so thank you for being a part of something that's new to me and that I can see as a resource for people because I know we all know horses are so smart so smart and animals that are that smart really powerful animals they have emotions and feelings

[00:56:10] and you can sense that when you're around animals like that it's like my dog my dog you know totally knows everything that's on my mind in my heart don't have to say a word just tell what I walk in the house

[00:56:22] and you see that same thing with horses so I know that what you're doing works I'm a firm believer in everything that you've said so continue that work thank you so much oh continue it thank you for having me yeah I appreciate both of you so much

[00:56:37] so phone number 720-891-114-2 correct to reach out to you correct directly correct and my and my website is recoverywithsurrenadestables.com and my email is serenitystables2021 at gmail.com and your recovery day is February 16th, 2018 yup we're good and congratulations on just passing six years thank you

[00:57:06] yeah girl cut five yeah Megan G and I are like right we're like right there just right neck and neck yeah we celebrate for each other yeah she's amazing too I love her yeah she was just here she's so great I love it yeah

[00:57:20] mile high if you have missed any portion of this program please you can find it wherever you listen to your podcast you can also go to our facebook page our youtube page and find this program share it post it on your page

[00:57:33] send it to somebody who you know that is dealing with addiction has a family member in addiction a friend in addiction and let them know about the great work that Christine does and let them know that recovery happens this is sharing our stories

[00:57:48] and we will see you again next week right here to share