Nina Shyne | Discussion Combustion Podcast | #254

[00:00:00] We'll have this discussion. Discussion? What discussion? This is a discussion.

[00:00:04] Discussion. Coming to you from Danver, Colorado. This is Discussion Combustion

[00:00:10] podcast with your hosts Kevin Batstone and Arthur Rawe. Hit the record button and

[00:00:17] send it. We got Nina joining us back here again. We left off last time on the

[00:00:21] show with you will be a repeat guest. You are a repeat guest. Great to have you

[00:00:24] back. Thank you for having me back. Thank you so much. Yeah, it's great

[00:00:28] I was really excited when I got the message with the invite to come back again.

[00:00:32] It's been a year, I think right? I think yeah, actually over a year. Yeah, we were still in our old studio.

[00:00:39] We were still in the old studio. Yeah. Yeah and you've been busy. Well what's fun about

[00:00:46] having people on like yourself is that after you come on for the first time then it's like

[00:00:53] that's when we really start following each other. For most of our guests, we know about them

[00:01:00] but then after they're on the show they start actually following us. We actually start following

[00:01:05] them and then you start seeing what this person is all about and all their growth and what

[00:01:09] they're doing and you have a lot of good content. I don't always watch all of our guest

[00:01:15] content all the way through but when your videos have come on recently there was some

[00:01:21] on breathing and you have your hands in certain places and then I watched the anger one today

[00:01:27] like where you're pushing on a wall and breathing out like ah, getting it out and I could totally

[00:01:32] see how that would help release anger. I'm going to have to refer to that one. Yeah so

[00:01:37] it's some good content and that's just scraping the surface on what you actually do.

[00:01:42] Yeah, it's funny I was thinking before I came on it was like oh how am I going to describe

[00:01:47] what I do today because it kind of you know, I am a coach but I'm also a practitioner. I help people

[00:01:54] with just about anything but my main focus is on recovering from emotional eating binge eating just

[00:02:00] nonchemical addictions so scrolling shopping and honestly I help people too who are struggling

[00:02:08] with substances but only if they're in treatment for that specifically to help their bodies

[00:02:14] but what I do is a great addition to that sort of care because it's a combination of somatic work

[00:02:21] which is that stuff you were talking about and we can do some of it together actually today if you

[00:02:24] want but some of these system regulating things, exercises and also you know my regular coaching

[00:02:32] which is you know combination of cognitive behavioral therapy mindfulness practices,

[00:02:37] awareness practices, taking charge of your story and rewriting you know your past it's trauma informed

[00:02:45] it's clearing out old stuff and going where did this shit come from is this me or is this

[00:02:51] thing that I've just been carrying along with me that isn't really serving me for my

[00:02:54] highest good and becoming the person I want to be so really I mean when people work with me

[00:02:59] it's you know it's not just sessions it's a transformation and you know since I've been

[00:03:05] you know I think I was like two years in with you guys maybe a year too and now you know with

[00:03:11] four years under my belt you know where I'm always just honing my skills and learning more stuff and

[00:03:16] just adding to that basket so that I can offer anyone in front of me something that's really

[00:03:21] going to be helpful for them so yeah been a lot of folks have so have you had any uh

[00:03:29] have you had any what would you call them uh students like a student or like a learner

[00:03:35] or like what how would you phrase that I guess no no I mean I have I'm still developing like

[00:03:40] what I'm you know where I'm going beyond just one of this is coaching no not yet I'd love to but

[00:03:46] but right now I think everybody that I coach ends up being that you know because what happens is

[00:03:51] they you know they'll go through these it's a six week thing most of the time maybe a little

[00:03:57] more depending on what the need is but um you know then they end up passing on that information to

[00:04:03] somebody else in their family if somebody you know their friends or you know whatever so co-workers

[00:04:08] and so I think in a way I'm doing that but I don't have like a coach you know a training program

[00:04:13] for my particular method of of doing no I guess what I'm what I kind of the root of what I

[00:04:18] wanted to get at here is you want to be with me yes you want you want me to teach you

[00:04:23] um hey you know we might be able to learn some things from each other that's a that's a trial

[00:04:28] close right yeah that was that's a trial close I'm at sales I know how that goes

[00:04:34] and and I like I like exploring all options to answer that question but um have you ever had any

[00:04:42] anybody that you help coach and after the coaching obviously they were making lifestyle

[00:04:50] changes and so a new found energy in their lives right and then you hadn't heard from them from

[00:04:56] a little bit you know they're they're flying free but then they they end up coming back to the nest

[00:05:01] for some you know have you had that happen like where it's like they need they need to come in

[00:05:06] for a refresh yeah I think sometimes like you know here's the thing so let's say I'm starting

[00:05:12] with with the person that I'm helping and they just want to come to me for recovering from

[00:05:16] emotional eating or a food addiction right well that's on ramp you know like the food addiction is

[00:05:22] like it's never about the food it's never about the drugs it's never we know this right we've heard

[00:05:27] a million times it's about what you're running away from using those things right and so

[00:05:34] you know yeah I mean over time it'll be like oh you know I really want to approach this breakup

[00:05:40] you know in the way that Nina would have would advise me to do it so they'll call me up

[00:05:44] and we'll do some work around that or you know this work situation or this other thing so yeah I have

[00:05:49] you know there's one or two that that come back into my care and my my guidance because

[00:05:58] and the reason the reason why I'm talking about that specifically is because I feel like

[00:06:05] on a health journey you know you do hit milestones which feel good and

[00:06:12] and part of the mind wants to you know have that accomplishment done right like you're like I

[00:06:18] accomplished that but then the second that you stopped focusing on it and then weeks past

[00:06:25] and then you know you kind of lost that muscle like you stopped working that that part of your

[00:06:30] mind out and so it gets weaker again and so I kind of just I'm thinking about that kind of

[00:06:37] specific thing and you know staying diligent just because you learn something if you're not

[00:06:44] applying it then you know you can learn anything and if you're not applying what you learned right

[00:06:51] then you're not going to be moving forward and you can move forward and then stop applying

[00:06:56] what you learned that help you progress and then potentially regress well yeah I mean you

[00:07:03] know me I like to use sports analogy so I'm kind of piggybacking off that and thinking I was a big

[00:07:07] I was a big Tom Brady Bill Belichick guy so I've used this analogy a couple times you know Brady

[00:07:11] obviously won a lot of Super Bowls who threw a lot of touchdowns but he was still being coached by

[00:07:14] you know Belichick and a lot of these other guys as offensive coordinators like they didn't just

[00:07:18] coach him his first year and say okay go out there and play he's still needed continuous

[00:07:22] coaching so to your point yeah I think I would kind of echo that as well and go

[00:07:26] you got to stay diligent with it you got to be you know me personally with my anger

[00:07:29] management journey which I'm curious to watch your video on oh yeah something I have to be

[00:07:33] mindful of daily right it's a it's a constant I don't just get you know I learned this information

[00:07:38] and that's it I'm healed right right kind of what we're getting at yeah that's a little bit

[00:07:44] what I was alluding to yes yeah yeah and what I would say on that is that there's a couple

[00:07:49] of parts of this yes you have to keep doing the work and you know the only times that I've

[00:07:54] I think there was one client this whole time that just wasn't doing the work because because the way

[00:08:00] that's with me is you know we'll meet for an hour a week and then you get assignments to do through

[00:08:06] the week so it's on you to do the work like we talk about what's going on and you know we get

[00:08:11] insights and you know whatever and I'm there with you but I'm guiding you to your own wisdom

[00:08:16] to your own empowerment I'm not I'm you know like you know I don't want to be the kind of

[00:08:22] practitioner where people are just addicted to me right and so what I'm doing is I'm empowering

[00:08:29] people to use these tools I'm giving them a toolbox to take with them to go off and do their life

[00:08:35] right and I do I think I'm the end all you know practitioner they're ever going to see again

[00:08:40] heck no you know there's gonna there might be somebody else who has something else that they

[00:08:43] need later on or whatever but for the way that I try to work myself out of a job I mean

[00:08:50] that's my whole thing is I don't want to be my favorite my favorite session with anyone

[00:08:57] is the last session when we're sitting there and they're going you know maybe like I had a client

[00:09:03] who you know came in like this you know and sitting like in the couch across from me and

[00:09:07] they're whipping up a tissue because they're freaking the fuck out can I curse I forgot can I

[00:09:12] curse on this yes you're good yeah so yeah he's ripping up tissue and he's you know flipping

[00:09:18] out and um and then you know by the end of it he's comes and he sits on the couch puts his

[00:09:22] arm up like this crosses legs you know and he's all open and there and present

[00:09:28] sovereign and in his amazing how much right body language speaks oh yeah yeah and we'll get

[00:09:34] into the whole somatic thing in a minute because I got something for you on that anger

[00:09:38] for my okay but yeah so um yeah so so to me it's like we have nothing else

[00:09:45] to go over like I'm like how about how's this going great I've got blah blah blah great

[00:09:49] how's this going great this other thing you were working on how's that fine oh and I also had this

[00:09:53] great conversation with my dad that I didn't think I'd ever be able to have or whatever you know so

[00:09:57] all this is happening and then we're like hey I think we're done do you feel like we're done

[00:10:03] and they're like hey I think we're done right and then I'm always there for them if they

[00:10:09] need me I'm always there you know whatever but what I want I don't want someone who's attached to

[00:10:14] me you know I think sometimes practitioners practitioners can sometimes we're all wounded

[00:10:22] healers right like we're all people who've been through shit hopefully so that we and then we

[00:10:28] discovered this way to heal and we want to share it with other people right was it glorious

[00:10:32] dynamo said the last step in healing is helping others or something like that um so yeah so

[00:10:39] we're all doing that right but what I think we need to be aware of in our practices is that we're not

[00:10:45] filling our own need to be needed or some story about being needed because we don't know how to be

[00:10:53] loved we don't know how to just be appreciated all these other you know inner stuff you know

[00:10:59] that could be going on with that you know I don't want to be needed I want to be appreciated

[00:11:04] I want to be thank you very much and what an honor to have guided them to their own

[00:11:08] empowerment but it's really not about them constant you know I don't want to be seeing somebody for

[00:11:14] 10 years I'm doing something wrong if I'm still seeing 10 years right or milk in your client

[00:11:19] like you're not actually trying to help them right exactly like who am I doing this for or even

[00:11:24] you know after I get really you know let's say someone has a big breakthrough and I'm like

[00:11:28] hi everything's cool who am I happy for am I happy for me because I'm such a bad ass coach

[00:11:33] that I made that happen or am I happy for them because I help them see their way through and

[00:11:39] figure this out for themselves right maybe a little bit of both maybe I mean yeah okay I'm not saying

[00:11:45] I'm not a bad ass coach I am but but you know it's it's not about you know I have to watch that

[00:11:52] and be like what what where's your ego check your ego a little bit yeah and check my own trauma

[00:11:57] my own story what need am I feeling in myself with this person no no no no so yeah so so um

[00:12:05] you know I don't know if that answers that we kind of went off under tangent but um you know do people

[00:12:09] come back and do they need more coaching sure but also hopefully now they're empowered and they

[00:12:15] know what kind of what kind of healing modalities and languages work for you know like do they

[00:12:24] keep going to yoga classes if that was what they were into sure do they keep going to the gym because

[00:12:28] that's how they really you know it helped their mental state or whatever real cool you know but like

[00:12:34] you know do they have to keep coming back to me because I've got something they don't

[00:12:39] I mean I have some information I have some I've studied the hell out of you know so much

[00:12:44] stuff of course you know that they don't have to go study on their own like I did when I first

[00:12:48] held myself right but I don't want anyone dependent on me like they have to keep coming back you know

[00:12:55] once you've got those schools you can just keep on growing yourself right well and you've built a

[00:13:00] credibility and like a trust with with your clients right so they're like you know if you're

[00:13:04] having a rough day or whatever and you also kind of alluded to you don't have it's not like a four

[00:13:08] week six week 12 week program it's the program that works best for the client and that could be

[00:13:13] whatever timeline that looks like but I'm sure you know it takes a timer to to build that trust

[00:13:18] and be like okay I'm starting to trust Nina this information is starting to resonate with me

[00:13:22] and they kind of like your the shoulder lean a little bit you know almost like a rock for them

[00:13:26] of motivation yeah absolutely and we laugh I mean you know I we're talking about heavy

[00:13:31] shit yeah for sure but we're also just human beings having this experience here and sometimes

[00:13:36] it's shitty and sometimes it's like why was I even thinking that way what the what the actual

[00:13:42] fuck you know and so you know it's there's we go through all the emotions we go through all

[00:13:48] the experience and just get that perspective you know and I think you know having that perspective

[00:13:53] of somebody else looking at you and going you are so fucking awesome you are so amazing

[00:13:59] and I want you to see what I see you know because there isn't a single damn person on this

[00:14:05] planet who doesn't deserve to be joyful resilient capable free from addictions free from you know

[00:14:12] aware of what they're doing feel empowered and sovereign in themselves there isn't a single

[00:14:17] human on earth that that doesn't deserve that and we have all these stories and bullshit piled

[00:14:22] on top of us you know that save the opposite of that or lead us to do things that don't really

[00:14:28] suit that you know and so my job is to help clear things off right and yes I have the

[00:14:33] tools and yes I have the education and yes I have you know whatever but you know once once once they

[00:14:39] have that toolbox once they have what I what I show them they have forever you send them in to

[00:14:47] start doing some construction they got the tools they're ready to erect a structure that's right

[00:14:52] yeah that's right and we build the structure apart together you know we definitely get that

[00:14:56] built up but once people start figuring out who the fuck they are and they start feeling

[00:15:00] really strong and great about themselves their whole life changes you know we might start with

[00:15:06] yeah I'm you know whatever I'm addicted to shopping and whatever it is and that's so small

[00:15:12] you know I remember talking to a client that I have actually seen on an offer a while and

[00:15:17] I said remember when you came to me about french fries look at you now like who even are you

[00:15:24] like that's just such a minuscule little moment in time of french fries are overwhelming to me and

[00:15:31] now you know it's like the layers and layers of revealing her true self her highest self are

[00:15:39] just like peeling away and peeling away and oh man it's incredible isn't that kind of funny like how

[00:15:45] the mind will justify it right because she ultimately and I had no zero about this other

[00:15:52] than what you just said but in her mind it was french fries you know and that was what she could see

[00:15:59] what was happening but really once you start peeling back the layers there's there's a reason

[00:16:04] why the french fry is the thing and that's kind of how you're starting this conversation

[00:16:10] so a couple things like I've been on a major health journey awareness journey and I feel like

[00:16:17] I've reached a lot of levels of success and this is like kind of like a warning I guess or like

[00:16:24] you know a disclosure to reaching levels of success because like you you get a high once you

[00:16:32] accomplish certain things right like like you're like I want to set these goals and then you

[00:16:37] accomplish those goals and then it's like sometimes you accomplish big goals and it's

[00:16:42] like well what's next you know maybe this is just a slowdown period you know and but then you must

[00:16:48] stay consistent so I kind of ask some of these questions because personally um you know I feel

[00:16:55] challenged by myself sometimes to like stay motivated like even though I know I'm doing

[00:17:01] the right things sometimes I still feel like you know like there's an emptiness still

[00:17:09] that like that you're trying to fill and so that comes from different places and even though

[00:17:15] I've like had growth it's just like we have to continue to sharpen the tools and and I feel

[00:17:20] like I'm still sustaining happiness and like finding enjoying the present I think that's

[00:17:26] where happiness is found is right now right here right now um but like anyone who wants to

[00:17:34] make that big impact on their lives like you have to realize that you might cross an intersection

[00:17:41] that was a big intersection across there's still a lot of road left and and you still got to stay

[00:17:47] maintained and so that's just kind of some of the things that I'm dealing with right currently

[00:17:52] so that's why I wanted to kind of pick your brain on you know how often people come back around

[00:17:58] or you know kind of your thoughts on sustained success beyond reaching some of the milestones

[00:18:05] so that was my foundation on these on these questions here well so here's the thing we're

[00:18:14] we're so fucking hard on ourselves we are human beings and sometimes you're real interested in

[00:18:20] going for the next thing and sometimes you need to goddamn rest you need to take a break

[00:18:26] you need to reassess you need to go within you need to go oh okay that was great I'm really proud

[00:18:32] of myself for getting there and instead of feeling like we got a push push push where's that story

[00:18:38] coming from that you got to keep getting better better better why aren't you finding the way you

[00:18:43] are right now why can't you just take some time and breathe and be where you are right now

[00:18:49] and just chill out for a minute and then when you feel that inspired motivation to do it again

[00:18:57] do something else do the next thing but it's people think that okay couple things came up

[00:19:03] for me when you were talking the first thing is is that we are not broken and we do not need

[00:19:07] fixing okay so we have this idea that there's something wrong with me if I continue to

[00:19:15] backslide if I continue to use if I continue you know if I have been doing great with this thing

[00:19:22] and then I didn't for whatever reason and you know it's this idea that there's that we're we're

[00:19:31] there's nothing wrong with the way that we respond to certain stimuli like triggers

[00:19:37] you know things like that it's our nervous system doing exactly what it's supposed to do absolutely

[00:19:43] perfectly so sometimes we get exhausted we get worn out we're like okay I accomplished the thing

[00:19:49] and I'm always going to want more yes you are it never ends this is fantastic you get to do more

[00:19:54] and more and more and more isn't that great you're never going to be fucking bored right but this

[00:19:59] sounds exhausting too like in the same in the same sentence right but it's not exhausting if you

[00:20:05] look at it like a like a joy like you're unwrapping press all the time like oh what's the next

[00:20:11] thing what's the next thing that was cool oh I really love that and I'm going to hang out here and

[00:20:16] you know play with my toy for a while and be really excited about it oh there's another present over

[00:20:20] there under the tree I'm going to go get it there's more right so it's how we look at it it's our

[00:20:25] it's the story we're telling ourselves we I think I said this before I'm going to say it again

[00:20:29] and I'll say it till I die we are meaning making machines so what meaning making machines

[00:20:36] right it's part of our and it's part of anthropologically speaking we have to make meaning

[00:20:41] out of things because that's how we categorize things and know whether or not we're going to

[00:20:44] die if we eat that berry or no matter whatever right but because of our fabulous prefrontal

[00:20:49] cortex that gets us into a lot of trouble right we come up with this whole fucking story right

[00:20:56] oh well you know I have like you just told me a whole story about how think you have these

[00:21:00] successes and then but then there's more and then there's more you're putting a spin

[00:21:05] it right based on your past what you're handling what's stuck in your nervous system from before

[00:21:11] right that's telling you that this is a fucking chore that this is exhausting that this is it's

[00:21:17] never ending you know either take a break and show yourself that you can actually stop and

[00:21:23] you'll be fine and you can rest right or change your narrative around it what narrative are

[00:21:30] you using you're saying this is a this is a drag well is it really a drag would everybody agree

[00:21:37] that that's a drag then it's not truth right we go for truth and the truth is is that it can be

[00:21:43] whatever the fuck you want it to be it could be an absolute sighting wonderful joy you know

[00:21:50] every time you fail every time you try something else every time you whatever what an adventure

[00:21:55] isn't this fun I get to do this shit right and I get to rest when I want to and I get to go when

[00:22:02] I want to and my gosh this is amazing right so you see what I'm saying it's I do and I can apply

[00:22:09] that to something small so washing dishes by like this is a good example because you're cleaning

[00:22:16] stuff it's it's a chore most people don't want to wash the dishes but currently when I wash

[00:22:23] dishes I'm thinking like you know it's nice to respect all the stuff I got to eat off this plate

[00:22:30] you know people I care about got to eat off those plates you know and I respect these plates

[00:22:36] and so I clean the plates I respect this place so you clean it so I totally understand that

[00:22:43] and there's and it's constant practice though I do agree though that it's like or I feel

[00:22:49] I feel like it's like I don't know why but I'm like stuck in this like fight mentality

[00:22:57] with it like a battle attack mentality like I don't know if like if long term if that's not

[00:23:04] sustainable right because like you know you can't battle forever you can't attack forever right

[00:23:09] like I don't know but I feel like it was a war for me so at the same time it's like I need to

[00:23:15] have that warrior spirit to where it's like you know like this warrior is ready to go to battle type

[00:23:22] a type of mentality and just because you're ready to battle and you're ready to put it on the line

[00:23:27] doesn't necessarily make it fun but you still got to like show up and get it done and that will

[00:23:32] always feel better to me than wanting to sit on the sideline ah it's too tough I can't handle

[00:23:37] that or I don't I don't want to walk up the stairs right now even though I know it's

[00:23:41] going to benefit me like I'll just walk up the stairs regardless but there's like that like

[00:23:45] mentality within it where it's like yeah I've achieved things but I'm still like going to battle

[00:23:56] and then and I don't know like really you know that's like a whole session I'm sure

[00:24:01] I know I'm like so we'll have a session maybe I'm gonna yeah on Tuesday no

[00:24:05] um so yeah that's like a whole that's like a whole thing but it's like you know

[00:24:09] anybody outside looking in like like I just want to express these things here like so people

[00:24:14] understand like and I'm not seeing a finish line right there isn't one and that's like I said

[00:24:19] the fact that there isn't a finish line is that a joyful thing for you or is that a fight

[00:24:24] and a battle and exhausting and that's just switching how you look at it that's making it

[00:24:28] fun that's good too that's you know instead of you know I gotta clean these dishes because

[00:24:33] you know people eat off these that I love or oh my god I've got fucking dishes like my kid and I

[00:24:39] whenever I'm feeling a little like with all that stuff you know the other day oh it was a couple

[00:24:44] weeks ago and um I just decided to go on a gratitude rampage like being grateful for every

[00:24:50] fucking thing I could see right so I grew it was downstairs he's 16 nobody joined me which was awesome

[00:24:56] um consider going like oh god there goes mom being weird but you know we ran around I was like

[00:25:00] we have a washer and dryer in the house it's right here it's in the leaking house we don't

[00:25:06] gotta cut our stuff put in a bag find the change go downtown wait for the stuff bring it we get to

[00:25:12] wash our clothes whatever the fuck we want I can wash my washcloth if I want to you know

[00:25:18] one wash wash and we looked at the dishwasher went oh my god we got to put our dishes in the

[00:25:24] dishwasher we have dishes we opened the cabinet oh my and we just ran around looking we have heat

[00:25:29] we have walls we have windows we have a dog we have you know oh my gosh what a rich life we have

[00:25:35] and it was super fun and it helped with things in perspective right so there's that part of it but

[00:25:40] that's still that's the effort right the effort is just touching what you're feeling and deciding

[00:25:46] because we create ourselves with every choice we make we're creating ourselves we're other

[00:25:50] going to keep creating the same bullshit by thinking and and acting speaking internally

[00:25:56] or externally and acting the same way that we always have been or we're going to say wait a minute

[00:26:01] that was bull old bullshit that I got fed by somebody else right we're programmed by the

[00:26:06] programmed right so what program am I running right now am I running my own damn program that I

[00:26:12] decided I want to run or am I running my pause or my dad's or my great grand pa's or whoever

[00:26:16] the fuck right so we take control we take charge of that and we we make a conscious choice

[00:26:22] right and so you get flack for running your own pro program huh like if flack from society

[00:26:28] when you Kevin I know you can speak to this when you run your own program like society like kind of

[00:26:35] makes it difficult for you well I feel like yeah because it kind of ties into and I was going

[00:26:40] to segue into this you know kind of this is where we're at now in 24 with everything being so

[00:26:45] social media driven podcast board a lot a lot of information coming out of a very rapid pace

[00:26:51] with it with smartphones and as I like to call it I'm right dot com everybody has the answer to

[00:26:56] everything it creates for not only a hostile environment but like people are constantly

[00:27:00] comparing themselves we look at and I was going to ask you your opinion on like the dopamine

[00:27:04] release that comes from people that maybe are addicted to scrolling their screens or posting

[00:27:09] videos for validation from the outside world you know it's just all these different things I

[00:27:13] feel like are really becoming an issue more of an issue in the last 15 20 years and we

[00:27:19] would see previously and that's just adding layers on top of what we're already battling with

[00:27:23] because I agree with everything that's being said here the you know the perception of of your

[00:27:26] world taking control of a perception being reality but now we have all these other layers

[00:27:31] on top of it which for some people make it very difficult sure so I actually posted a video

[00:27:38] on social media about this ironically um that you know you got to pick your algorithm right

[00:27:45] so if you okay I actually I know segue into one of my books yay but things are going shitty in the

[00:27:52] world whatever it is that you're upset about today right happening across the world happening in

[00:27:58] your neighborhood happening in your whatever right if you are if you stop repeatedly and watch

[00:28:05] it's called doom scrolling for a reason you watch the video after the video about the

[00:28:10] terrible thing the terrible thing the terrible thing the terrible thing what happens to your whole

[00:28:15] entire day right and then what happens with your reticular okay so your reticular activating

[00:28:22] system we're going to get sciency your reticular at activating system is always looking for patterns

[00:28:27] in things right it's the reason why if you decide today I'm going to notice all the yellow

[00:28:32] cars or let's say you like are looking to buy a new car and you know I know Ford Escape

[00:28:37] and all of a sudden everywhere you drive you see a Ford Escape right that's your

[00:28:42] reticular activating system listening to what you say you want to see more of so if you are

[00:28:47] constantly looking at the negative the negative the hard the bad the fighting the this and that

[00:28:52] you're going to find more of it not only on social media because you paused or god forbid you

[00:28:56] actually reacted or commented or gotten an argument with this fucking stranger about it right

[00:29:01] what a waste of time um or when you go out for the rest of your day someone's going to cut

[00:29:06] you off in traffic something you know you're going to spill your coffee blah blah blah and it just

[00:29:11] reinforces what you are looking for right so if what happens when you clean up your social media

[00:29:18] feed and you only post things that you can feel positive about or that you can feel effective in

[00:29:23] right so the circles you have to hold it longer you have to hold it I know I'll be back to you

[00:29:30] that was just a tease I'll be back in a second so what you can do is

[00:29:38] so what you're doing when I'm getting at is yeah it seems like everybody's fighting

[00:29:44] it seems like it's a really hard terrible world out there my feed is like people who are supporting

[00:29:50] each other people who are calling attention to to cause friction for things to be effective

[00:29:55] for people who are posting I don't know rituals and recipes and fun shit because that's the

[00:30:00] algorithm I'm creating you know yeah and so if we it's a more it's a more healthy positive

[00:30:06] algorithm right you do have an influence on this right you have influence by not clicking

[00:30:11] not and clicking on the things you do it's the exact same thing in your mind when you're not

[00:30:16] on an app focus on the things you are appreciating focus on the things you're grateful

[00:30:21] for focus on the things you love focus on the things you want more of and you will get

[00:30:26] more of it because not only law of attraction and all that shit but your reticular activating

[00:30:32] system in your fucking brain is actually making you notice more of the stuff and when you are

[00:30:37] vibing reticulate active is a system reticular reticular activated reticular

[00:30:43] activating system

[00:30:57] it's actually called the RAS I thought your man is smart ass no it really is oh no

[00:31:01] I just turn everything into an acronym like the MMM you said earlier the we're the maker

[00:31:05] whatever that's a triple M right there yeah you just did that you're like that's a triple

[00:31:10] we got a triple M alert here yeah so watch your algorithm on what you're scrolling and what you

[00:31:16] think the world is like because of what you're watching because I tell you there's like a billion

[00:31:20] other perspectives on it right yeah and also yeah and and work where you're effective so where I

[00:31:26] was going to go and with the book thing but um so there is shit happening in the world and we

[00:31:32] can't deny that there's some pretty crazy shit going on in the world and what people are

[00:31:35] journey is uh yeah is they are posting scenes from you know more of this negative blah blah

[00:31:43] are you we are fucking aware we are fucking aware of what's going on over there and watching it all

[00:31:48] the time how is that changing anything all that's doing is making me a person who's not adding to

[00:31:54] the love and the peace and the joy and the positive energy in the world right because now

[00:32:00] I am in the bucket with the rest of the crabs I'm in the shit or two right so what is effective

[00:32:07] you take action it's not like you're turning a blind eye to it and being like you know all

[00:32:11] privileged in the shit or whatever people yell at me about but it's about being effective and doing

[00:32:17] what you can to change the world in the ways that are actually going to do something and so

[00:32:23] it's a practice that I call the circles of effectiveness that I developed with you know

[00:32:27] helping people with this and with myself but and then I wrote a book on it you can get on Amazon

[00:32:33] and we will leave that link below the link is there um but it's how to take effective

[00:32:38] action when the world is on fire and the top here says stop doom scrolling and do something

[00:32:44] right our brains are not made to constantly been taking in all of this negative stuff it's

[00:32:49] actually not made our brains aren't developed enough to even take in more than reading

[00:32:52] the fucking newspaper and watching the five o'clock news like we used to do right so it's

[00:32:58] affecting how our brains are developing and there's lots and lots of studies about that right

[00:33:02] so what I talk about in here and what I do with the clients with and myself and my family and

[00:33:07] everybody is we work in these concentric circles where we're actually making a difference

[00:33:13] and the first circle is us we feel like I know there's a lot of people who feel

[00:33:18] like because the world is all shitty and stuff is you know whatever that they feel guilty or bad

[00:33:23] if they take rest or if they take a bath or if they do something for themselves or they're eating

[00:33:27] nutritious food and they're loving the people it you have to start with you because I mean god if

[00:33:33] you want to get into like conspiracy shit they want us exhausted they want us worn out they want

[00:33:37] us well we want they want us to feel ineffective right so yeah so what do you do

[00:33:43] feel scared of an eclipse that nothing happened

[00:33:50] I know sorry I had to say that once I was disappointed that the rapture didn't happen

[00:33:54] I was like oh no I like I had my gun ready and everything that's an FM that fear mongering

[00:34:02] yeah get that out of here I know okay so the inner circle is us so the first circle is us right

[00:34:08] so yeah and the way I've been like a 20 minute tangent if we allowed ourselves I don't know

[00:34:13] brain it in boys brain it in so the first circle is us and then I have a little thing about blah blah

[00:34:20] you know what I just said and then the next circle is your household so if the circle comes out just

[00:34:26] a little bit right so how what if we're so worried about what's going on on the other

[00:34:32] side of the world that we're not checking in on what's going on in our kids world if we're

[00:34:36] so distracted by all of this stuff going on out here that we're not giving attention

[00:34:41] and love and care to the people right in our home right or fixing problems that we might have in our

[00:34:47] home or whatever it is right or you don't have people in your home your plants probably need some

[00:34:52] fucking water get a grip right or if you don't have any plants you should probably get some plants

[00:34:57] also everyone should have plants side note yeah yeah I mean come on um and there's something

[00:35:02] just can't kill you and then you go to your neighbors an hhp it is an hhp so you go to

[00:35:08] your neighbors right so what can you do who knows who knows their neighbors who the hell not even knows

[00:35:13] like can you help them in with the groceries can you at least say hi make some kind of connection

[00:35:18] right we're on these screens all the time where we're not connected to other human beings right

[00:35:23] so how can you make some connection just in your neighborhood and then maybe if you're in

[00:35:26] trouble they'll come help you and maybe you can help them or maybe there's whatever have a

[00:35:30] heavy yard sale I don't know it's spring um and then there's your your city so can you

[00:35:35] volunteer somewhere can you go you know what can you do to make the world that you want to be

[00:35:40] right be the change how can you do this in the areas that you're actually effectively touching

[00:35:45] right then we go to the state level and the country and the world and we got petitions we got

[00:35:51] calling our our representatives we got you know whatever like being aware of what's happening

[00:35:56] and doing protests you know whatever but we that's it that's all we have right we're not

[00:36:03] going to go over there and stand between the gun and the whatever the person right we're going to

[00:36:08] be able to do what we can from here right and then we do those things and we always have to come back

[00:36:13] to the first circle we come back to that first circle where we're once again tending to where

[00:36:18] we're actually putting that ripple out into the world to make it the kind of world that we

[00:36:24] want it to be and we're not just fucked into the doom of it all right so I'm not it's not

[00:36:30] about don't do anything it's not about you know don't at me whatever the kids say but that makes sense

[00:36:37] it does all really back to ourselves yeah and there's a actual journal pages so every day you can be

[00:36:43] like okay today for me I'm going to do this for my household I'm going to do this for my neighbors

[00:36:48] I'm going to do this for my community I'm going to do this state level and the end of world right

[00:36:53] so you can crack of it and feel like you're actually doing something writing things out

[00:36:56] and taking steps and having a list that you check off makes us feel like we're getting

[00:37:02] shit done because we are and we have proof of it so we're not stuck in that constant spiral of

[00:37:08] feeling helpless helpless and despondent there you go with my whole rant on what do we do about

[00:37:14] scrolling yeah and I like that because it's something that needs to be addressed we talk

[00:37:19] about it a lot in this program of course and I like hearing these different perspectives

[00:37:22] because I mean we can talk about it all day but there you actually have an action plan here

[00:37:26] which puts in motion for people to go okay let me first all roads lead back to myself

[00:37:31] then it's taking care of my household and my neighbors and then it starts to outreach rather

[00:37:35] than just sitting there and being like well you know it's a shit show out there I'm scared

[00:37:39] because I mean I've been I've been guilty of that you know you see the nonsense going out

[00:37:43] there it's like well good thing I got guns and I can hunker down you know the mind's easily

[00:37:47] to go there kind of go into defense mode a little bit so I kind of like that proactive

[00:37:51] action plan of controlling what we can control and not worrying about what you can't

[00:37:56] yeah and and it's not to say don't touch on the things that you can't because I believe we all

[00:38:00] have some you know if there's enough of us yelling about it you know but also

[00:38:04] you can't live there you can't keep that you know because it doesn't do any good and all it does

[00:38:09] is make you completely ineffective in all of the other circles right well and I had like this whole

[00:38:15] thing on so growing up okay being selfish was like kind of taught to me to be a bad thing and in a lot

[00:38:27] of circumstances being selfish is a bad thing so if we just change that word a little bit and

[00:38:34] we switch the word to like something like you know um you know self like uh you know

[00:38:42] looking inward you know you can look inward and then that could then be a positive thing

[00:38:47] instead of saying selfish because if you're not looking inward and taking care of yourself

[00:38:52] then you're more susceptible to getting caught and I've talked about this I don't know if we

[00:38:59] explain this to you or like this whole um and this isn't my concept but how the subconscious

[00:39:04] mind works is like a whirlpool a whirl uh what is it in the water is it a whirlpool

[00:39:10] whirlpool is what they call that so it's like a whirlpool in the water and the natural path of

[00:39:15] the subconscious mind when you're just kind of it's just going you're not thinking about what

[00:39:19] you're thinking about it's just autopilot it you got a picture of the thought process like

[00:39:25] you're in this pond or whatever and it has a whirlpool in the middle and negative thoughts

[00:39:31] are natural and that's like what pulls you in and then when you're constantly talking about drama

[00:39:36] you're constantly talking about all this stuff you're like in the whirlpool you're repeating

[00:39:40] the negativity you're an echo chamber for the negativity you see it everywhere like what

[00:39:45] you're talking about and then so as you start to take these conscious efforts to change what

[00:39:51] you're seeing you can know that all the bad things exist we can't be ignorant and say

[00:39:56] that bad things don't exist right um so we have to still acknowledge that but you could be more

[00:40:01] conscious of you know i'm so fortunate to have a laundry machine or i like to go on walks and and

[00:40:07] i really get focused on the walks and like wow listen to these birds look at all this all this

[00:40:12] stuff around me there's so much life around me you know and getting present in that sure there's

[00:40:17] like all these wars happening but i'm not focused on that so like the more conscious that you are

[00:40:21] the further out of this whirlpool that you get and the calmer the water gets and so like when you're

[00:40:28] stuck in it like it's harder to get out but then as you continue to consciously make this effort to

[00:40:33] swim out of the the whirlpool the water gets more calm and then and then the reminders are less

[00:40:39] so like what i'm kind of talking about like with i don't know some of my personal stuff is

[00:40:45] like i'm like i feel like i get relaxed and then i don't swim as hard and then like i start

[00:40:50] getting pulled back into the whirlpool and then i got to start paddling again and it's like this

[00:40:56] this thing right but i like what your your books about and as far as like acknowledging

[00:41:02] things but not allowing it to be your focus i believe is like one of the main probably points

[00:41:08] to it right right yeah and also just you know like i said being effective where you can be it's

[00:41:14] not saying don't take any action it's say saying wake up and realize where you're actually

[00:41:19] going to do what you want you know you want to change the world and starts with us but it also

[00:41:24] circles out and yes you can touch on all of these things but again you know like you're saying

[00:41:29] with the doom scrolling and you know your feet is full of angry and mad and violent and this and

[00:41:34] that and the other thing and mine's not so it must not be absolutely true that's a good point

[00:41:41] oh yeah i'm and you know who was it i mean i'm not saying you are like this but there is

[00:41:47] this expression that's you know we don't see things as as they are we see them as we are

[00:41:53] right and what i would touch on with that is that we see things

[00:41:58] that need healing in us we we see you know if we're having a lot of anger a lot of frustration

[00:42:05] you know from our past that stuck in our nervous system again that reticulating

[00:42:10] reticular activating system is going to look for opportunities to resolve what's been stuck

[00:42:15] in our nervous system right and you know it either shows us something about ourselves right like how is

[00:42:23] this show what is the showing me about me or what is the showing me that's in me that wants resolution

[00:42:29] wants to be resolved wants to be looked at right so you know with with you guys with just stuff

[00:42:36] that's stuck you know i feel like i do this and then i get pulled right back in you know i i'm

[00:42:41] still working i'm still fighting this thing that won't so do you guys know about somatic healing at all

[00:42:49] like body like nervous system that's the hand things like breathing techniques okay so no i don't know

[00:42:56] about it okay so somatics um it's peter levine is the big dude you know with with the whole

[00:43:03] school of thought around and he's just amazing and he's it's been it's been around i for a little

[00:43:09] while at least for like 10 years or something like that but um it's just absolutely mind blowing

[00:43:16] how these practices of embodying and allowing and observing without the story

[00:43:24] and letting the nervous system feel what it needs to feel actually is the ticket to

[00:43:31] quieting down those things that we're constantly fighting with so i'll explain a little more so

[00:43:37] trauma let's say there's the traumatic incident that happens and it can be there's a spectrum of trauma

[00:43:44] it can be anything from you know terrible acute thing happens right we're attacked something horrible

[00:43:51] or it can be any situation where you were not able to complete your nervous systems natural

[00:44:01] natural survival response okay so an example of that is you know a kiddo in school raises

[00:44:11] their hand and they say something stupid and or the kids laugh at them even if it wasn't and

[00:44:17] they're shamed and feel horrible about themselves and they just shove it down and go okay uh no i

[00:44:25] hope nobody sees me and then what happens when you're an adult you don't want to raise your

[00:44:29] hand you don't want to speak up you don't want to whatever because that part of you got stuck in

[00:44:33] that time it got stuck in your nervous system that response and reaction now if the teacher came over

[00:44:39] and said you know what i'm sorry everybody laughed at you i actually liked what you had to say

[00:44:49] response complete it had resolution another good example is like you know in nature shows or

[00:44:54] whatever you know you see the gazelle is it that's chased by a lion is that the right animal for the

[00:45:00] right continent i think so everything okay fine so yeah so it goes so gazelle's running away from

[00:45:08] a lion right so wait so gazelle's chilling eating grass totally cool everything's fine

[00:45:15] uh oh lion fuck right so the bell goes into the net the gazelle's nervous system not thinking

[00:45:22] brain right the nervous system goes fight flight or freeze baby what are we going to pick and

[00:45:28] fights not going to work very well freeze isn't going to work very well let's fight let's do it so

[00:45:33] the whole nervous system floods with all the chemicals and everything goes and there goes

[00:45:36] the gazelle the gazelle gets away from the lion right they are currently flooded with

[00:45:42] emotion the kind of feelings what we would call emotions are the same things that this

[00:45:46] gazelle is feeling right what we would call fear or what we would call you know anxiety or

[00:45:51] whatever it is right so the gazelle if you watch these shows every animal that gets away from the

[00:45:57] predator does something physical to release that energy the gazelle will shake and starting

[00:46:07] in grass or like hop around or something yeah they do something to to complete the loop it's

[00:46:12] like a there's a survival mechanism gets triggered off and then it has to complete it's a loop

[00:46:17] that completes right but as humans shut up you can't cry you're not allowed to be angry

[00:46:24] that's rude don't talk to your mother like that and you can't oh crying is for babies blah blah

[00:46:29] blah shove it down shove it down shove it down shove it every single fucking time right we shove

[00:46:35] it in we shove it down we're not allowed to express we're not allowed to complete it

[00:46:39] and you know the gazelle you know meaning making mm m our meaning making machine right comes

[00:46:44] online right the gazelle isn't like i'm a terrible gazelle i'm so stupid for going into that field

[00:46:49] where the lion wasn't oh my god there might be a lion again i'll never i'll never eat grass again

[00:46:55] that we do that with our stupid prefrontal cortex right that makes meaning out of shit

[00:47:00] right so we make this meaning out of stuff and so and what do we do mom's mad at me

[00:47:06] i'm shocked you know like the person i love just smacked me or just told me i'm stupid or

[00:47:12] did something you know whatever you know they're ashamed of me they frowned at me i mean you know

[00:47:16] it can be anything and i don't have the capacity to cry about it or to let that thing go and then

[00:47:23] be comforted and you know close that loop right close that experience and so we make up a meaning

[00:47:30] mom and when we're before we're three years old everything is us right mom hates me mom's mad

[00:47:37] at me i'm bad i don't deserve love i don't deserve i can't trust love i can't trust women

[00:47:44] there you go that's it and that's your story now for your whole fucking life until you wake up

[00:47:49] and notice wait a minute why do i feel like that what what the hell is that right and it's

[00:47:54] stuck in our nervous system that's the thing that talk therapy and you know it's great and

[00:47:59] it's awesome and i love all my therapist friends you know nothing no no disc but

[00:48:04] you know what when we don't work with the body too because i do both you know

[00:48:08] when we don't work with the body too and just let that sensation be there without a story like

[00:48:15] where where do you feel anger in your body like if you brought up the feeling of anger

[00:48:20] right now where is it in the liver so in your in this area here in your gut like bill

[00:48:27] oh you can't sit here this is new information to me but yes okay that's where most of my pain is

[00:48:32] okay so it's it's here and you feel that sensation in there so through a session what we will do is we

[00:48:38] will just be with that sensation of where is this in your body where is this feeling of fear anger

[00:48:46] sadness whatever that you've been pushing away and pushing away and pushing away every time you

[00:48:50] push it away you know it's like a toddler right mom mom mom mom mom mom you know will this

[00:48:57] situation you know again that ras is looking for ways to complete right that's why you end up with

[00:49:02] the same damn boyfriend and in a different body all the time that's why you end up having the

[00:49:07] shitty thing happen at work that's why every single time this same thing happens it's because

[00:49:12] your system wants to complete so we don't use a lot of words we don't necessarily get into

[00:49:19] the story we get into a safe calm space we do this thing called resourcing where you create that

[00:49:26] safe safe container in your body where you're feeling really at ease and then we just invite

[00:49:32] in the sensation of the thing that's bothering you and we feel it in the body we feel its

[00:49:37] qualities we feel its textures we feel it's we notice its colors you know and if a thought

[00:49:42] comes up or an image comes up sometimes they're really wacky and out there and it's really

[00:49:46] funny someone's like why do I see a chicken right now you know that chicken means something to your

[00:49:52] subconscious and it's showing you something right so we go through this process of just allowing

[00:49:56] the sensations to be and mofo it just calms down because if you pay attention to that kid for a minute

[00:50:05] who's going mom mom mom mom yes oh the kid goes yeah i wanted to show you my ball oh what a

[00:50:12] lovely ball thank you and then right not to get rid of anything but to integrate

[00:50:18] so it's parts of us that we left behind in all of those moments where we went

[00:50:23] I can't finish this loop I can't express it I can't cry I can't this I can't yell I can't

[00:50:28] have a tantrum I can't do the things I need to do and all that's all those moments of

[00:50:32] stuckness are still stuck in there and they come out sideways in all of these other ways

[00:50:38] so just being with that sensation through these sessions is just remarkable and you know it's not

[00:50:43] always in one shot sometimes but you know sometimes it takes you know a few of these to

[00:50:49] those things and let peel away those layers but it's such a relief to have that moment of attention

[00:50:57] and having that safe container that you create for that spate for that thing that has been

[00:51:02] vying for your attention for so fucking long to be able to have the floor for just a minute

[00:51:08] like I hear you I see you I'm so sorry I've been pushing you away and ignoring you

[00:51:13] and that's acknowledging like grief or acknowledging like so a lot of the

[00:51:21] stuff I talk about is things that I learned so it's like you know we have to experience our

[00:51:26] emotions and if we try to like push our emotions away like people don't want to feel sad but like

[00:51:33] it's important to feel sad we should be observing how we process life you know and like if we can

[00:51:42] look at ourselves feeling these emotions I know it might sound weird but like we observe ourselves

[00:51:49] feeling the emotion then that way we can actually process it because I feel like sometimes

[00:51:56] people are afraid to you know actually um look at like look at it dead in the eye and really figure out

[00:52:05] like this is this is it right and that's that's what's so cool about doing the somatic processing

[00:52:12] this and you know I'm actually it's from a shout out to the school the center for healing in

[00:52:17] Australia they're amazing and they teach this but um it's it's it's allowing the body to process

[00:52:24] because I think what people are well I know what people are the most afraid of is that they don't

[00:52:28] want to revisit the pain again they don't want to go back there to that incident again because

[00:52:34] it terrifies them where they feel like they're going to be overwhelmed again and that's why

[00:52:38] there's this step-by-step process of creating safety creating a container creating you know like

[00:52:45] the first few sessions there might be nothing more than just building up that sense of safety

[00:52:49] and resourcing in a story or an image or a place in the body or whatever you know and then slowly

[00:52:56] allowing this disturbance in it a little bit at a time so that it has a space to exist

[00:53:05] just for a little bit right and you can turn it up and you can turn it up or you can turn it down

[00:53:10] or whatever and there's this whole process of doing it um that's completely completely safe

[00:53:15] and so different than let's look at the thing that happened to you again let's talk about it again

[00:53:22] you know and like it it ends up not being like I was saying about that chicken thing you know

[00:53:28] you know like we might think it's about like the big bad thing that happened when I was six

[00:53:32] but our subconscious wants to keep us safe right so it's going to show us a little incident

[00:53:40] that has a similar feel but is digestible from that time right so like the chicken thing you know

[00:53:48] like it was my mom yelled at me before I went out to feed the chickens and I didn't have a voice I

[00:53:53] couldn't say anything back to her and I was so hurt and felt so terrible in that moment right

[00:53:59] it wasn't the big bad thing but it still touched on the same emotions and the same stuff that

[00:54:04] was stuck in the nervous system so it could be processed the whole system is so wise it's doing

[00:54:11] exactly what it's supposed to do even in the moments when it shuts down wait you know like you can't

[00:54:17] respond you can't react brilliant you know like and it's keeping you safe if I cry and freak out

[00:54:23] right now I'm going to get hit right so it does what it's supposed to do it's just that those

[00:54:28] stuck things throughout our lives will come out sideways and one and the best I mean gosh what's a

[00:54:34] great way to distract ourselves from feeling the things that we don't want to feel eating drinking

[00:54:39] sex shopping scrolling you pick you name it you know so dopamine yep yep and and you know we're

[00:54:47] we all we're all addicted to something we all get you know oh my god I've been scrolling for five

[00:54:51] 10 20 minutes an hour you know whatever I should you know whatever or it's fine you know yeah

[00:54:56] we're not being terribly hard on ourselves you know like we're humans and we're going to do what we do

[00:55:00] you know but it's that awareness you know that really makes the difference and also just allowing

[00:55:07] all of the parts of us to be welcome that we've been pushing and fighting and I've got to get

[00:55:13] rid of this part of me honey you don't got to get rid of it you got to integrate it you have

[00:55:18] to metabolize it you allow it completely the opposite of what a lot of the therapies have

[00:55:24] been doing for such a long time and it's super I mean mind-blowingly effective

[00:55:32] I could see that no I mean yeah just processing all this information it all makes sense you know

[00:55:40] I mean it's where focus goes energy flows that's one thing I like to say I like the fact that we're

[00:55:45] not running from we're going to integrate it right like I remember last time you were on

[00:55:48] art you were kind of dealing with a jalapeno chip addiction a little bit yeah yeah yeah

[00:55:54] the half the bowl that's stuck with Nina you know it encouraged you to portion control a little bit

[00:56:00] yeah just have the bowl you don't need the whole bag just have the ball so you can still have these

[00:56:03] things and maybe still have a drink if that works for you or whatever maybe do a little shopping

[00:56:08] but you know I guess that's that's just kind of it's a perspective thing it's how

[00:56:12] it's how you look at it and how you allow that to be a part of your day to day life and I

[00:56:15] guess that looks different for everybody right right absolutely and and everybody you know like I

[00:56:20] said we're seeing everybody through the lenses of our own experiences everything that we see is through

[00:56:26] the beliefs that were created when we were younger or were passed down to us again program by the

[00:56:32] program right so yeah it's pretty profound programmed by the program right are we making

[00:56:39] this program thank you but are we making I'm sure I got it from somebody else

[00:56:44] it's all from somebody right um but it's true like if you think about that you're all like you know

[00:56:50] did my parents know any better and then like are they teaching me and then like do I know better

[00:56:55] who am I teaching right right and what are you deciding is true you know these beliefs

[00:57:02] that we we are so attached to you know if if it isn't that the sky is blue and water is wet then

[00:57:08] it's up for debate or that we pay taxes everyone everyone believes that

[00:57:19] yeah I did my that's that's for another title yeah that's a whole other who anyway you want to get

[00:57:27] more that's not the way to get more views on youtube um so um yeah so yeah this it's perspective

[00:57:36] but also I mean I think the difference between where I was with you guys you know and because

[00:57:41] we're always evolving and growing if we're not doing that in our practice you know we're

[00:57:46] we're not learning new things and what right so you know before it was this like just change

[00:57:54] your mindset just change your mindset just change your mindset and it doesn't work that way

[00:58:00] is what I've discovered you know like yeah it's part of it but if you can get that clean slate

[00:58:08] where you've integrated the bullshit the program that you were running and you've like been with

[00:58:13] that sensation and you've been with that feeling and you start allowing all these parts of you

[00:58:17] and pulling that power back from all oh my gosh you become so powerful because there's all these

[00:58:22] little batteries that you left behind if you will right like every time something shitty happened

[00:58:27] a piece of you got left behind and that has some energy in it that has some energy in it that

[00:58:31] you gather all that energy back up and say I got you now and guess what I've got good news

[00:58:37] it's now and now is full of infinite possibilities now I can fuck I want to decide now I'm going

[00:58:45] to write my own program I'm going to decide what beliefs I want to keep and which ones I want

[00:58:49] to throw out I'm going to decide who I am and how I want to be in the world and you can

[00:58:54] recreate yourself but first what and I think the thing that's been missing with all of the toxic

[00:59:01] positivity and the you know law of attraction stuff with like just stay in a high vibration

[00:59:06] well that's you can't that's not human and and and recognizing that you're going to have

[00:59:13] moments of low vibration and loving them loving yourself no matter what to me the answer is

[00:59:18] just unconditional love of fucking part of you and your anger deserves love your you know frustration

[00:59:27] your battle everything that you're talking about that seems to be something you're coming up against

[00:59:32] if you love it and allow it and say hey hi old friend irritation you're back again

[00:59:39] how's it going what do you want to show me oh you feel like you know hot prickly

[00:59:45] right here in my gut okay we're going to be with that

[00:59:49] yeah I feel you yeah hot and prickly right there in the gut and I swear to you you do that for a

[00:59:54] few minutes and it starts dissolving yeah that's what's been there's a power there's a power to

[01:00:01] acknowledgement so basically this is like the steps okay is first we must make an acknowledgement

[01:00:10] of our current sensation or of past sensation which is then causing the current sensation

[01:00:18] because it's like that I have a story to it no you would you don't need to add the story to it at all

[01:00:23] okay so the pat like just currently let's just stay present that's like knowledge

[01:00:27] acknowledging the present and then like having a neutrality with it to where it's it's like

[01:00:33] you're not judging it you're allowing it to be what it is no worries no thoughts no where did

[01:00:39] this come from no let me analyze the fuck out of this and all this must be from that time it's boring

[01:00:44] nope you're just being with the sensation of it what is what a color is it what does it smell like

[01:00:48] what does it feel like what you know how is it heavy is it light is it dense is it see through

[01:00:52] is it you know just being with that sensation and allowing it to be there and breathing with it

[01:00:57] which will get me on to my next thing about breath but go ahead oh and just my last piece

[01:01:03] there was you know with the acceptance and now neutrality that we have embraced to do our best

[01:01:13] with that and I feel like as long as we're trying our best and sometimes my best yesterday

[01:01:19] might have been like phenomenal and then my best today might be subpar but as long as like

[01:01:26] I am giving it my best then I know that I did that I feel like those three that those are like

[01:01:34] three pillars and there's hundreds of pillars you know there's just three pillars that I'm kind of

[01:01:38] picking up on right now yeah well in most and also you know not trying there's so much

[01:01:44] effort in going on right like relaxing into it accepting flowing ease like how can things be

[01:01:52] more easeful right where we're going yeah I did that I'm really proud of that I had a killer day

[01:01:58] yesterday I was super productive and that feels good today looped and I don't feel super productive

[01:02:04] and that's great too and I'm gonna listen to my energy I'm gonna listen to my body I'm gonna be

[01:02:10] friend myself I'm gonna be friend every part of me and go what do you need what do you

[01:02:17] need right now I need to lay the fuck down for a little while I need to take a walk I need to

[01:02:23] whatever you and yeah there's all of these skill things like how to you know stay focused and do

[01:02:28] it we're productive productive humans just sometimes need to fucking rest and and not be

[01:02:37] constantly oh my gosh we're so like I said we're so we're just too hard on ourselves and what

[01:02:42] that leads to is I've worked so hard today and I've done so many things for so many people

[01:02:48] this is me by the way I do this so you know I I deserve a brownie I deserve a drink I deserve

[01:02:56] to go shopping I deserve to do this thing and no we don't have any money but it doesn't matter

[01:02:59] because I'm going to shop anyway because I need to feel better for a minute I deserve it you know

[01:03:05] it because we're efforting all the time and we so we feel like we need reprieve

[01:03:09] what if you don't have that much that you're always going to have something like that there's all

[01:03:13] what you know we have a payment as people for a reason right there's nothing wrong with it but

[01:03:19] what if most of the time you're so like just going with the flow of how you're feeling and what

[01:03:25] you're doing and making plans and things and it's exciting and it's fun and it's you know

[01:03:29] you're allowing all the oh that's an old feeling oh hey I haven't checked in with you how you

[01:03:35] doing okay cool are you to be here guess what I have great news it's now and we can do this

[01:03:42] come on come along with me right what if we're more in coherence with our heart and our body

[01:03:48] and our and our minds and our breath and we're just being a little bit more and we're not constantly

[01:03:54] efforting around right then we don't have the desire to grab the food or to grab the drink

[01:04:00] or to grab the whatever person or whatever we're grabbing with consent right so

[01:04:07] so yeah so just just roll that around a little bit you know like how much efforting am I doing

[01:04:12] through my life like is this all about like you know the one who dies with the most self-help book

[01:04:18] books wins no you know it's it's about being a person and allowing all the parts of what that

[01:04:24] is and being that observer which might go over people's heads but you got it brother we are the

[01:04:29] observer of our thoughts we're the observer of our beliefs we're the observer of our actions and when

[01:04:34] we're sitting in that seat of awareness which is what we really are there is so much peace

[01:04:40] and so much choice and so much love you know just love more love right

[01:04:47] yeah I totally agree totally need love spot marley said one love

[01:04:56] yeah so yeah so yeah it's more about no it's an it's an enlightening conversation and

[01:05:03] you know it's so easy to complicate like humans have a knack for over complicating things

[01:05:10] overthinking yeah when really the answer is is pretty simple you know it's all it's all pretty

[01:05:17] simple and honestly one of the areas that's helped me and like sure like I might still like smoke weed

[01:05:26] or whatever or I might you know have some drinks every once in a while or whatever but

[01:05:30] I sure as hell don't do painkillers anymore and that that's like a huge thing for me and um

[01:05:37] and it's just like being in the present like that's help help help keep me where I'm at

[01:05:44] and happy and content right because like oh and and like side note though it was like a year and a

[01:05:52] half two years after I did a painkiller I felt the painkiller high naturally and like that was

[01:06:00] milestone in my own like head to like get that sensation sober basically I was on a walk when

[01:06:06] it happened paying attention to nature living in the present is when that happened but yeah living

[01:06:12] in the present is definitely like having this conversation like you know being here with one

[01:06:18] of my best friends and like you know absorbing the space that we're in you know is that's life

[01:06:25] and it's so easy to overthink and over complicate when really it's super simple to tie this all back in

[01:06:31] is if we could just focus on the now and this is all we have this is all that matters like

[01:06:37] you know there's that there's like that tightrope of being conscious and understanding thought

[01:06:44] that's and it's interesting and if you're not practicing on it like how we started this

[01:06:49] conversation and I was asking those questions of like you know do you see people come back

[01:06:53] and like this and that because I do believe that there is no finish line and you have to

[01:06:58] continue to work on yourself constantly and like and like you said it can be really joyous and

[01:07:05] you're finding these old pieces of yourself that bring light into your life and it's like a balance

[01:07:11] of you know how much effort am I putting into this compared to how am I feeling and my my

[01:07:17] happiness output and then all the emotions that you're talking about about getting

[01:07:21] like allowing those emotions to happen because if you're growing and you want to be happier more

[01:07:28] consistently but then you feel sad then maybe you start questioning and over complicating why

[01:07:33] you're feeling sad when you were on this happiness trend so there's like a lot that's it to easily

[01:07:39] over complicate here like it's easy to overthink a lot of this but it's it's very simple at

[01:07:45] triple M triple M alert triple M alert yeah and you know one of the things that's that this segues

[01:07:54] nicely into well two things first of all but I want to touch on this real quick which is we spend a lot

[01:07:59] of time and I made a reel about this on my tic-tac which I just started because I'm old and decide

[01:08:04] well actually the reason why I started was because they told me not to um so like oh you

[01:08:09] can't have tic-tac anymore guess what anyway no I just want to reach as many I don't care if

[01:08:13] I go viral you know it's not about bad it's about reaching as many people as possible and it's just

[01:08:18] a surprisingly really good platform for them um and I see people are saving my videos which is like

[01:08:24] who cares if you know how many views I have or followers like the fact that people are

[01:08:28] saving them and using them is like oh my gosh great um anyway um but um we spend a lot of time

[01:08:37] like working on this whole inner child thing and you know gathering up these sad and difficult

[01:08:43] things in these sad and difficult parts and we are so oriented to the negative and the things that

[01:08:50] need work need work and again nobody's broken we just have stuff covering up our beautiful

[01:08:58] glorious amazing selves that we came here being right so what if we asked our inner child

[01:09:05] what makes you happy when when was the time where you felt joy even if you had the crappiest

[01:09:11] childhood on earth there was one moment most likely where you were like huh I'm at ease and

[01:09:17] I'm doing this thing maybe you're just stacking up sticks in the woods go do it again

[01:09:23] elaborate expand on that elaborate on that bring that little child and say we get to do

[01:09:28] what you wanted to do when you were when you were then when you were there then

[01:09:32] and we get to do even more what else do you want to do how can we play we don't play enough we don't

[01:09:39] like again that joyful running around looking at the dishwasher and the washer and dryer

[01:09:43] where's the joy and the crazy and the fun and the silly you know like like you know

[01:09:48] Sean Antonio with his fuck yeah Fridays you know like every message is everybody and goes what are

[01:09:53] you doing for fuck yeah Friday and we all got to put on music and dancing a crazy and

[01:09:57] whatever and just be stupid because we take all this shit so fucking seriously and that's what drives

[01:10:03] perfectionism story I have to constantly work on myself because I'm not there yet brother there is no

[01:10:09] there yet we're there now right you're there now we are here right it's just about clearing off

[01:10:16] all the crap and embodying this now and pulling all those parts that we've been pushing away

[01:10:21] and saying come on and we got this and look we can create whatever the fuck we want in this very

[01:10:27] moment by every choice that we make let's fucking have fun with it and do it let's fuck up let's do

[01:10:32] something awesome let's fuck up again let's see how this is like and what if I touch that it is fun

[01:10:38] fucking up it is depending on how bad that fuck up is well there's severity is a

[01:10:44] simply there is but it's not your full sentence I am full sentence you know that's right that's right

[01:10:50] you know send it send it that's right so let's do it right I know we got a hand

[01:10:55] soon but what I wanted to bring up we were bringing up presence and the the it's so underrated

[01:11:01] and we do it all the time but there is nothing that brings us into presence better than breathing

[01:11:07] consciously right so when I it's free and it's always there and we are not doing it enough right

[01:11:16] Brian Ridgeway is a great teacher um and he he teaches about just this circular breath and

[01:11:21] this presence breath he calls it and you're breathing down into your belly because we're

[01:11:25] always holding our guts in don't get me started on that right so we're always holding in a

[01:11:30] holding our guts in and being tense and tight babies when they breathe their bellies go

[01:11:35] in and out and it's all belly breathing right so consciously just really breathing

[01:11:41] brings us into that presence and that's why exercise does that is because we're talking about belly

[01:11:46] breathing and diaphragm breathing earlier today where you really want to mention that yeah I was

[01:11:51] I was talking so it so is belly breathing like better over like is what's the difference

[01:11:57] but pay attention just pay attention to your breathing okay great purposefully now I'll

[01:12:02] I will say one thing that the belly breathing is great I don't want to say what something's good

[01:12:06] or bad it just do whatever just breathe regardless yeah right but one of the things that is good to

[01:12:13] know is that when you breathe out longer than you breathe in it tells your nervous system that

[01:12:17] you're safe because what happens when we're freaking out and the lion's chasing us is

[01:12:23] right hyperventilate yeah

[01:12:25] yeah

[01:12:28] we breathe out with that side so that's why we do those exercises when we put our hands somewhere

[01:12:33] that feel comfortable you know we put our hands together we do this there's all different kinds

[01:12:37] of connection so you can put your hand one hand on your chest and one hand on your belly

[01:12:42] right and take a breath in

[01:12:47] and breathe out with a sigh like your shoulders drop

[01:12:51] oh what is it with that natural like I feel like

[01:12:58] I was doing that natural sorry sorry

[01:13:02] let's see it

[01:13:06] breathe in and out a few times

[01:13:07] okay now you can talk

[01:13:20] well no because it was it was interesting because the sighing out yeah I feel like that's

[01:13:26] something that I was kind of doing naturally right and then I noticed you were saying to be more

[01:13:34] cognitive of the I do feel I feel more calm now after those breaths I just want to say that too

[01:13:39] but like something about sighing out is like what is it about making the sound with the exhale

[01:13:48] it's just so like crispy yeah it relieves you it makes it crispy it relieves that

[01:13:54] nervous it relieves your nervous system you can make a noise you're not hiding from a predator

[01:13:58] right we make that noise when we're tired we have a good yawn

[01:14:04] right that's true yeah so it's that right so it's the noise that comes within that

[01:14:11] and opening the throat and opening that you know like I'm not going to get all witchy here but

[01:14:15] I you know I can do but you know we're opening that throat area we're opening all of this up

[01:14:21] right that's a lot of podcasts mixing up ritual and all this kind of stuff and the

[01:14:26] there's layers to this oh yeah it's a craft it's a craft but yeah opening all of that up and telling

[01:14:35] the nervous system not your brain but you're telling your nervous system we we're good

[01:14:40] it's good we're okay right and when you're feeling angry right being with that anger right

[01:14:49] I guess we need to tag you in the video but but one of the things that I was teaching was to

[01:14:55] push against a wall and be with the anger let it be there anger is the it's okay I can't decide if

[01:15:08] it's anger or sadness that's well sadness is often under anger but anger is probably one of the most

[01:15:15] misunderstood emotions and the most shunned emotions that humans have right especially in men

[01:15:25] because man angry bad thing might happen right or woman angry most of the time we end up crying you

[01:15:31] know which I hate that but it's true and there's reasons but you know men and their

[01:15:37] expression of anger anyone's expression of anger like if you're mad when you're a kid what happens

[01:15:42] right you don't get to say I hate you to your mom right you don't get to say I'm you know I'm pissed

[01:15:48] about this you don't get to have a tantrum you don't you're not allowed right and and expressions of

[01:15:53] anger are snuffed so much but you know what anger is anger is the seed of your power anger is no

[01:16:01] anger is don't cross my boundary anger is what makes a mom be able to get a fucking car

[01:16:06] off of her toddler righteous rage it's that rage right so if we allow it in a in a way where it's

[01:16:12] not going to come get you know cause destruction or you know the reason why it's causing the

[01:16:19] destruction that's coming out so fucking loud and crazy is because of all the times it got the

[01:16:24] lid put on it it's gone oh right so if we allow ourselves to be angry and go oh yeah

[01:16:31] oh I'm angry right now okay and you just let it do its thing feel it be with it be with the

[01:16:40] sensations on it not with the story of I'm angry because this fucker this that that no just being

[01:16:45] with the sensation of the anger and allowing it for a minute and going okay and then discharging

[01:16:51] it before you take action right then you're gonna put your think I always say in the

[01:16:58] videos you turn your thinking brain back on right because when we're in that triggered heightened state

[01:17:02] emotional state our emotional yeah we're in our reptilian brain right like we're not thinking

[01:17:09] so to turn our thinking brain back on we we do something you know we can you know do our

[01:17:15] breathing whatever but pushing against a wall is fantastic push ups like actually doing push ups

[01:17:23] because that has more action in it and it's not quite as discharging because it has the up

[01:17:28] right and you're also exercising brains like oh we're exercising but why are we pushing on a

[01:17:32] wall just for anger sake right we don't do that you want to do something more original okay yeah um

[01:17:38] and so you you can push against the wall and when you're doing it you're going

[01:17:49] right like get crazy get loud right and we're like whoo she's making loud sounds how embarrassing

[01:17:54] fuck that like we're people and we make sounds yeah who cares right and so do it like get it out

[01:18:00] right and then you'll notice that it's starting your breathing starts to go huh

[01:18:07] closing the cycle then you get off that wall and you okay now i'm angry and i have something i

[01:18:16] need to say to you and we're going to talk about this right thinking brain comes back

[01:18:22] i give this picture that like somebody pisses me off next time and i'm like i got something to say

[01:18:26] to you but really quick wait i gotta push on the wall i'm just pushing against the wall they're

[01:18:30] like standing over like oh shit i don't know if i want to do it i'm like ah that would be that

[01:18:36] that's kind of funny oh never mind you would you would change the dynamic of that conversation

[01:18:41] live action something else you can do in the moment because i also teach that because like

[01:18:46] you know i had this whole video someone asked me like how do i set a good boundary and we were

[01:18:49] talking about how boundaries are not something where you're telling somebody else what they should

[01:18:53] do but you're telling them what you're going to do right so boundary is it who suck and if you

[01:18:58] keep talking to me like that you you need to stop talking to me like that it's if you continue

[01:19:02] to speak to me this way i will remove myself from this conversation and then if they continue

[01:19:07] to get to you that way you do right that's about right but if you're already triggered and

[01:19:12] flipping out you know because this person's like being whatever you know there's instead

[01:19:18] of doing this where they're going to see what you're doing you can just push your fingers together

[01:19:23] any kind of connect them i do push your fingers together take your breath

[01:19:33] and then respond right and you can say i need to take a breath before i respond to you

[01:19:39] that's valid that's not going to scare them right

[01:19:42] right and then you can respond because you're thinking brains back on right so it's all about

[01:19:48] the connection making some kind of a connection somewhere in your body right and the breath

[01:19:55] and that longer breath than the than the in-breath or longer out-breath than the in-breath right

[01:20:00] so you know if you're feeling another thing you can do if you're feeling really angry

[01:20:04] and you can tense your body in a way that they can't see it

[01:20:20] right i've done that naturally yeah yeah but consciously do it on purpose right yeah yeah

[01:20:27] so yeah and with the breath the breath is the fucking key to everything if we're breathing

[01:20:34] present if we're present we're here if we're here then what's in front of us is not flavored

[01:20:38] by our programming or the past or whatever we're just we can see this thing clearly

[01:20:44] and we can make a choice in how we want to be right so yeah so this is powerful

[01:20:50] this is this is powerful information it's good stuff thank you yeah and again it's all come from

[01:20:56] all of my teachers and everything that i've studied and all that i just you know make it in a

[01:21:01] my own thing well yeah we just do our thing and bring in elements of all of it depending on what

[01:21:06] we need that day you know well i love it and obviously you have supporters out of kevin and i

[01:21:13] so i was thinking about like a quote today and i don't know where i don't i don't know if

[01:21:19] this is an arthur rock you're gonna ask me to come up with one i was like oh shit okay or if it exists

[01:21:24] elsewhere but but i was gonna say that you cannot control the speed of the winds of change

[01:21:35] something along those lines like you know you might be feeling the winds of change

[01:21:40] but you cannot control the speed of the wind or something like that kind of thought process

[01:21:44] you know like it's there and like things might be easy to change sometimes and sometimes that wind

[01:21:50] is like blowing really hard and like and like you know my dad's a sailor so like i'm always thinking

[01:21:54] about the sailboat and like how when the wind is whipping and you're like trying to get these

[01:21:58] sails they're like it's all loud and like i don't know so that that's kind of a fun one but

[01:22:04] can't can you come come up with a quick nina quote for us i don't have a nina one but i do have

[01:22:10] one of my favorites um which um oh shoot i'm gonna forget who it was menopause is real dude it's real

[01:22:19] i'm surprised i've actually continued this whole conversation without completely forgetting

[01:22:23] that i was where i was so um i can't remember who it was who said it but i'll try to remember

[01:22:30] so i'm sure if you if you have comments on someone's going to say like oh blah blah

[01:22:33] but until they said until we make the unconscious conscious it will rule our lives and we will call

[01:22:41] it fate i like that yeah so it's all about just what am i run what am i running what is this program

[01:22:52] how do i deal with it i take a breath and i make a choice and i sit with that feeling for a second

[01:22:56] i acknowledge it i take a breath i make a choice and it's just being aware allowing and

[01:23:02] softening to the whole experience of it but it's all about awareness and that breath when you're walking

[01:23:09] you're breathing you're breathing probably deeper than you normally do so you feel really present

[01:23:15] right that's true i like the quotes quotes are good i like your win the win thing though it's

[01:23:20] gonna come to me and i mean after we're done i'm gonna be like what's this person um yeah i

[01:23:26] like the win thing and it's true you know like there are definitely things happening outside

[01:23:30] of us but it's like are we that are we the unshakable core in the eye of the storm that

[01:23:37] things can move around us and we don't get quite as swept up as we once did you know do like you

[01:23:44] know and that's what i end up you know my one of my goals with all my clients is i call it

[01:23:51] finding your unshakable core you know okay wait so here it is oh yeah wind the wind of change

[01:23:58] is upon us but but you cannot control the speed of the wind like it's always breezy right i don't

[01:24:08] know there's something there it's it's fun keep working on it keep working on it it's it's fun to

[01:24:12] think about yeah it's pretty good i don't i don't have a custom quote but there is one that comes

[01:24:16] to mind that i don't know the original quote maker and that is mastering others is strength

[01:24:23] but mastering yourself makes you fearless oh i love that mastering others is strength

[01:24:29] mastering yourself makes you fearless yeah that is kind of goes back to all roads lead back to

[01:24:34] loving yourself right that's right loving yourself first you got to work in those circles man

[01:24:40] you know and we have all these are the circles to life yes

[01:24:52] yeah well oh my gosh this is so great i love those quotes too but anyway what an honor to hear

[01:24:58] how you are doing too i love how you know one of the things that blew me away the first time

[01:25:02] i was on with you guys was just how open and raw and real you are with where where you are and what

[01:25:10] you're working with and it's just so refreshing and it's so great because we spend a lot of time

[01:25:17] you know just masking what we're what we're handling you know and and it's it's just lovely

[01:25:23] to have you guys be so upfront about who you are and what's happening for you and dropping your

[01:25:28] own wisdom and you know it's we're all learning from each other all the time are we you know like

[01:25:33] it's just always take away something we're mirrors for each other you know we're always seeing you

[01:25:39] know i'll notice that that's what's bringing you back into our lives and like you know kept you

[01:25:43] around like in orbit yeah it's it's it's amazing how the energies continue to attract yeah

[01:25:48] it's great and you know on this side of it i love having folks like you on and shon and

[01:25:53] tonio and all these tremendous people that we've been able to sit with and visit with

[01:25:56] and learn from and you know just exchange ideas and breathing techniques and quotes and you name

[01:26:01] it that's that's what makes it fun on this side of the camera you know and as well as it is for

[01:26:05] what the viewers and the listeners take from it that's great too but just being able to do this

[01:26:09] is being in the present moment is fantastic yeah absolutely we are right now aren't we there's

[01:26:14] nowhere else to be nothing else to do you know like we're just being with each other and

[01:26:19] and sharing knowledge and sharing love and you know supporting each other and it's a beautiful

[01:26:25] thing man we need more of this right well you're making an impact on on the first episode where

[01:26:31] you came on you made an impact then and like that whole like you know you can still have

[01:26:37] that bullet ships you just don't have the whole bag i thought about that sense like kevin had

[01:26:41] mentioned and on on this one i definitely there's some lessons that i learned on this episode

[01:26:46] too that i got to peel back and like actually digest and think about it was a lot i dropped a

[01:26:51] lot no but it's it's good it's good because you know these are the type of conversations that people

[01:26:57] should be having you know like acknowledging like if we're feeling bad acknowledging if we're

[01:27:02] feeling sad like that's part of the essence of living these are the emotions that we sense

[01:27:08] and like to put that in a closet and try to hide it is counterproductive

[01:27:13] so there's just so many great things we will definitely guide everybody to all of your

[01:27:19] pages and i got is i want to make sure this was on the podcast but nina sent like all of her links

[01:27:25] like everything was super professional and like you know you already like packed it out like

[01:27:30] that was super professional and i wanted to give you a nod to you know you know making it super

[01:27:37] easy uh to help share what you do and what an honor it is to do that thank you yeah it's been

[01:27:45] great and yeah i'm so glad that you can share that stuff and you know if people want to grab the book

[01:27:50] or get in touch with me or whatever oh and i should mention too that if anybody does want to chat with

[01:27:55] me um my email is great you know i do have my website and now i'm very much sliding scale

[01:28:00] because you know things are a little rough out there um but it's just a no commitment chat to

[01:28:06] start you know where we just talk about what you're struggling with what i do and see if

[01:28:10] we're even a good fit because it's not going to work if we're not so it's just a little chat and when

[01:28:16] we just get to know each other a little bit worse comes to worst we go hey no yep and if and if you're

[01:28:22] listening to this right now and you think you should do that just act on it within three to five

[01:28:26] seconds send it don't talk yourself out of it your information is telling you that for a reason

[01:28:31] that's right that's right yeah there's no one of the things that i my quote at all quote for

[01:28:36] myself if i may is um it is uh the every moment that you don't start is one less moment you're

[01:28:45] going to have being where you want to be i like that so how much longer are you going to put it off

[01:28:52] because all you're doing is cutting the time shorter and shorter where you're where you

[01:28:56] really want to be right and remember i'm living truth guys like i was addicted to food i was in a

[01:29:01] real bad place i was you know using stuff and all the crap and you know i don't even recognize that part

[01:29:09] of you know you know i'm a survivor it's beautiful you know assay and domestic violence and all

[01:29:15] different this is not me just being like oh i'm a middle-aged woman and i'm going to share all of

[01:29:19] my wisdom with the people you know like i went through some shit and i figured out how to get

[01:29:24] out of it and now i just keep learning more and more and more ways to help other people

[01:29:28] out of it too and of course i use this stuff with myself so you know let's be real and let's just get

[01:29:33] to work man you know time's a waste of love it as wean gritsky says he missed 100 of the chances

[01:29:39] you don't take so it's time let's get after my goalie kid we just went to go see the crack and

[01:29:46] we love them anyway we love them anyway well you're amazing if anyone you already know this

[01:29:54] but it's always still encouraging to hear your you have epic energy you're amazing

[01:29:59] you're making an impact the positive impact on the world and again we are honored to be able to share

[01:30:06] it and and help lead people to you you're fantastic and it's such an honor spending some time with

[01:30:13] you we could probably sit here and talk for another two hours easy yeah we could easily get it

[01:30:17] yeah we're just scraping the surface well hand me back again we'll play some more yes yeah come on

[01:30:24] down to Denver for a visit we'll get you on the couch i know i gotta do that i gotta do that i know

[01:30:29] it's like a straight cat over here oh that counts right there i like how you use the pillow you

[01:30:36] get comfortable with that pillow yeah so so comfortable you can make noises while you exhale

[01:30:42] that's true yes you have a live action breathing session just think of the possibilities that's all

[01:30:48] we do for like an hour and a half just breathe the whole time people like oh yeah that's the one that

[01:30:53] goes viral yeah that's on the map people are like that one part where they didn't realize but

[01:31:00] all their breaths were synced up that changed my life it's big work here that's great that's

[01:31:07] good stuff well Nina thanks again for your time um this great show this is what i'm definitely gonna

[01:31:12] play back because there was so much information i'm back i got a list to it again so uh that's always a

[01:31:17] fun feeling to leave these i think we got all your stuff in the show notes down below for our

[01:31:20] viewers and listeners just cruise down there and get in touch with Nina and uh yeah this was a lot

[01:31:24] of fun absolutely thank you guys so much what a blast this was really lovely thank you i'm

[01:31:30] so our pleasure our pleasure and i'm gonna be pushing on some walls you god damn guarantee it

[01:31:37] and everybody out there tune it in please be good to yourselves you deserve it